Tired of pretending (kiribaku)

Chapter 8: The talk (and a short monlouge)

Potential Tw: mentions of abuse and self-hate

Also quick A/n: I changed this chapter a bit since I didn't like how it turned out , it's a pretty major change just a heads up

Bakugos P.O.V

I'm panicking

The stupid voice in my head is back again, my thoughts are getting louder.

If only I hadn't been so weak.

I can't believe everyone saw how pitiful I was , now they know I don't deserve to be here, I don't belong here. All the memories I suppressed are beginning to worm there way into my brain, I just can't take it.

If I was stronger I wouldn't be dealing with this.

Weak

Weak
 
Weak

Weak

WEAK...

My thoughts were interrupted by a bright light. I slowly opened my eyes to find kiri staring at me. He seemed to be talking but I couldn't make out what he was saying until my hearing sharpened.

     "Are you okay bakubro..?" I heard him ask, why is he so concerned why should he care about someone who's such an ass to everyone around them.

     "Tch..of course I'm fine shi-" I stopped mid sentence as I saw the look of pity in his eyes.

     "I'm fine.." I mumbled , averting my gaze as to avoid his pitying looks. I had failed him, if I hadn't been so stupid and weak I wouldn't have had my mask slip and shatter Into millions of pieces.

    "Bakugo ...may I have a word with you" I heard a voice from behind me say. I flinched and stared up at Mr.Aizawai. I gave him a slow nod, not wanting to speak any more as I was sure any more strain on my voice would trigger another break down.

I heard Kirishima and Mr.Aizawai converse for a moment but I didn't bother to listen , they probably didn't want me to know. I heard Kirishima utter a quick goodbye before racing out the doors of the infirmary. I wanted to reply but he was already gone.

It seemed that recovery girl wasn't in the med bay as the room was completely silent. I gulped and glanced back over at Mr.Aizawai. No matter what he saw I had to tape my mask back together I was to far along to let myself be helped , I didn't deserve it after all I would just trouble them all if I told them.Keeping it to myself was the only option i couldn't afford to spill anymore secrets.

     "Bakugo ...? " I heard Sensei call out to me.

      "Yeah.."I grunted not taking my eyes off the ground.

       "You've been zoning out for the last minute or so .. will you please tell me what all that was about back there , a normal person wouldn't be freaking out like how you did when effected by Tekos quirk."I felt his gaze set on me which made me squirm uncomfortably on the bed I was sitting on.

      "I -I It was nothing I'm fine , everything's fine" I muttered, my words stumbling out of my mouth as I attempted to make full sentences.

    "Bakugo...nothing about what I just witnessed was fine , you were freaking out, and mumbling some concerning things...is there something going on at home or is it something else ..?" I could feel his eyes narrowing as he said this.