audacity // kryoz

thirty-two

Alex nods thoughtfully for a second before speaking up again, "Well, I'm off. Don't do anything I wouldn't do,"

"Is there anything you wouldn't do?" I tease.

"Meth," he answers without missing a beat.

John laughs loudly and I smile. Maybe I was stressed over nothing.

***

We had settled into our hotel room quicker than I had expected. I was lying on my stomach on John's bed lazily flicking through TV channels. John was laid next to me with his head on the pillows. He was scrolling through his phone, paying no attention to what I was doing.

Without any warning, I groaned and sat up. I pushed myself onto my feet and turned around to John, "I'm bored, let's go somewhere,"

John started spouting questions but I didn't answer them. Instead, I reached for his wrist and pulled him towards the edge of the bed.

"Where are you even planning on going?" He asks,

"No idea, but I can't stay here. I'm going to lose my mind just waiting for tomorrow to come," I quickly reply as I slipped on the pair of shoes I had on earlier. 

 John seems to accept my answer as he begins pulling shoes onto his feet. Before I knew it we were walking out of our hotel room with our keycards in hand.

We walked into the hotel lobby trying to figure a plan out. Both John and I were on our phones looking into stuff we could do nearby.

"How hungry are you?" John asks passively as we step out of the air-conditioned oasis that was the hotel lobby.

Huh. I didn't even realize that I haven't eaten today. My anxiety about today and tomorrow made me completely forget about eating and now that I think about it I'm ravenous. "I'm pretty hungry," I respond quickly with a small smile.

"Are you feeling for Chinese food?" John says while looking up from his phone.

I shrug, "I'm not too picky,"

"Then Chinese food it is,"

***

As we walked silently, I focused on how the laces on my sneakers jumped and fell with every step. Without noticing I had fallen into my thoughts, I was running through every possibility of tomorrow that I could possibly think of. 

"So, how are you holding up?" John asks suddenly which tears me from my thoughts and my eyes from my shoelaces.

I give him a tight smile before answering, "I'm alright, just a little anxious but nothing too bad,"

A little was an understatement. I was shaking in my boots at having to bear an hour let alone 2 days with my family. I was the outsider and after all this time of avoiding them, I knew it won't be any better than before. I shouldn't have come. Is it too late for me to back out? I shouldn't have brought John. I can't believe I'm making him be my little support animal. Jesus. I can't believe I just realized that he's about to meet my crazy family for the first time and I have yet to ask him how he's doing. How insensitive am I?

"You're about to meet my family for the first time, so how are you holding up?" I ask John.

A tired smile makes its appearance on his face before he huffs lightly, "I'm definitely anxious but I think I can handle it,"

"Anxious about what exactly?"

He laughs lightly, "I'm scared that your family is going to talk over my head with Italian,"

I laugh loudly, "That's definitely going to happen, but I will do my best to translate, and if I can't, remind me to teach you pronouns and curse words so you know if they're cursing you out."

John laughs, "I think that will be helpful,"

I laugh softly before I toss my hand onto his shoulder, "Don't you worry, I'll give you a crash course in Italian over Chinese,"

We had paused to cross the street but since there were cars crossing we were stood on the curb. He smiles at me and with the sun setting behind him, he looked like an angel. Pure heaven-sent angel. Kiss him, my mind tells me unexpectedly. Before I could tell my brain to shut up and push that thought deep into the recesses of my mind, I acted on it. I don't know how but my body moved on its own. I didn't think of the repercussions, I didn't think of the different outcomes and I definitely didn't think about whether he would kiss me back or not. In fact, my mind was surprisingly clear. In less than a second, I had simultaneously pulled John down and pulled myself up while tilting my head slightly and closing my eyes. I paused for a millisecond once my lips had touched his before pressing my lips to his fully.

We stayed like that for what felt like forever but was actually less than a second. John had only begun to kiss me back when I was knocked back into the right frame of mind. I pulled away immediately and opened my mouth to apologize profusely but before I could get a word out John had taken his hands and cupped my face and leaned down to connect our lips once again. In shock, it took me a moment to catch up with what had happened and once I did I kissed him back without hesitation. As cliche as it sounds, it was like everything around us floated away into nothingness. All I was aware of was the way John's lips moved against my own. I hadn't been kissed in so long that I almost forgot what it felt like. His lips were slightly chapped but it didn't bother me. I smiled into the kiss and deepened it a bit. I didn't want it to end. I wanted to stay like this forever but alas that is impossible.

I had nearly run out of air when John pulled away. The feeling of air on my slightly swollen lips was a sobering moment. I had just made out with someone on the street. That said someone being John who I had yet to decipher my feelings for. That said someone who I was sharing a hotel room with and stuck in a city a plane ride away from home. Oh, and not to mention we are damn near best friends. Can I just pretend that this never happened?

A/N

hola. i am back with another update. lmao i was suddenly inspired to put a teeny bit of drama in here so i did. i will cause a bit of angst in future chapters but not too much as it physically pains me to read angst so i won't make u guys endure that. anyways this will prolly be the only update in a while since school is back in session next week :/ stay safe. until next time. love u.