Come Down in Time

Chapter 3. Realizations

It was one bounty gone wrong.

Faye and Spike returned to the Bebop, pissed off with each other and arguing all the way from the hangar into the common room.

"It's all YOUR fault!" she exclaimed as she stomped into the room. "We'll be eating instant noodles for days now!"

"What the hell, Faye, you're the one that let him get away!" Spike growled, slamming his gun on the table. He reached into his jacket for his cigarettes, angrily pulling one from the crumpled pack to light. He inhaled deeply and exhaled, trying to dissipate some of his anger with the action.

"He was going to SHOOT you, you stupid idiot!" Faye screamed at him. "What was I supposed to do?"

"You were supposed to do your fucking job!" Spike yelled back. "What were you doing watching me, anyhow?"

Faye looked at him stricken. Her mind flashed back to that day he'd gone to fight Vicious. She'd known that he wasn't coming back, that he had left knowing that he was going to get himself killed. She'd been in a funk for days when there had been no word from him. She and Jet had resigned themselves to the fact that he was probably dead. And it had been hard, really hard. The ship had been silent without him and Ed and Ein, no more constant bickering, no one to fight with, no one left to fret over. And now, here he was, telling her that she should have let him get shot? She had lost him once, she couldn't go through that again.

"I … I …" Faye floundered, she could not think with him yelling at her. She turned away before he could see the tears welling up in her eyes. "Fuck off, Spike!" she screamed, storming away towards her room.

"Oh no, you don't," he muttered, grabbing her arm. "I'm not finished with you yet!"

"Let me go, Spike," she exclaimed, struggling to free herself from his grasp. "Let GO of me!"

Spike pulled her back, whirling her to face him. "You were the one that was supposed to …" he paused when he caught a glimpse of her face. Was she crying? "Faye?"

Faye kept her head down, hair tumbling into her eyes. The thought of him seeing the emotion reflected in her face terrified her. He's going to know how I feel about him! I can't let him look at me! Faye tried to jerk her arm out of his grasp.

"Dammit, Spike, let go of me!" she shouted, wincing as he gripped her arm tighter.

"No," he said calmly. "I want to know, are you're okay?" He reached out to brush the hair away from her face.

"No, I'm NOT fucking okay!" she exclaimed, glaring up at him, swatting away his hand. "I couldn't let you die again, like before-"

Spike stared at her in bewilderment. His grip on her arm lessened, and Faye jerked away, dashing to her room.

Spike started to follow her, but he hesitated. What do I say to her?

He reached into his jacket for another cigarette, but changed his mind. He didn't know how to respond to this side of Faye. She'd been acting weird ever since his admission to her that night. They had not spoken about it, but it was obvious that it was on her mind. His heart clenched as he recalled the look on her face. He growled to himself, shaking his head. Damn, I don't need this right now. Everything was fine between us before. Wasn't it? Why does she care so much about what happens to me?

Why do I care so much about her?

He needed to talk to her.

Spike walked down the hall to her room and stopped at the door.

"Faye-Faye?" he called to her, using Ed's pet name. "Can I come in?"

She didn't answer, but he could hear her moving around the room.

Spike tapped on the door.

"Faye, open up, we need to talk."

"I don't want to talk to you," came her muffled response from within.

"Look Faye, it wasn't all your fault, you were just trying to help–"

"Fuck off, Spike!"

Spike took a deep breath, trying not to get impatient. Here it was, one of the few times that he wanted to talk to her, and the wench had to choose this time to be stubborn. He rapped on the door again, louder this time.

"Faye, just open the goddamn door!"
"Spike, what's going on?" Jet suddenly appeared behind Spike. Spike turned to survey him, eyes dark. Jet's timing was perfect as ususal, he always seemed to show up in the middle of one of his and Faye's quarrels. He was not in the mood to explain anything right now, he just wanted to talk to Faye.
"Nothing I can't handle," he mumbled, turning away to face Faye's door again.

"So how'd the hit go?" Jet asked, mystified by the look on Spike's face. "I'm guessing it didn't?"

"Yeah, that's right," Spike answered him irritably. "Now would you let me-"

The door to Faye's room suddenly slid open, and she stormed over to Spike, her eyes glistening with barely concealed rage.

"So, lunkhead, how are you going to handle this?" she asked sarcastically, glaring up at him, hands on hips in an arrogant pose. "Tell me again how stupid I was to choose saving your ass over the bounty?"

Jet's eyes widened as he turned to look at Spike.

Spike remained silent, running his fingers through his hair. He looked down at Faye, an unreadable expression in his eyes.

"Ookay," Jet said slowly as he eyed the two of them. This was obviously a private conversation and he definitely did not want to be caught in the room when stuff started flying. "I'll just go and check on the bonsais." Spike, you idiot, she looks really pissed, he thought as he backed away to escape to the bonsai room.

Neither Spike nor Faye noticed him leaving as they glared at each other. "Well? Cat got your tongue?" Faye asked defiantly, breathing heavily in barely concealed anger as she stared up into his face.

Spike looked down at her, his angry resolve evaporating as he observed the glistening tears in her eyes. She's so beautiful, he thought to himself. She's so beautiful.

"Do you know how pretty you are when you angry?" he whispered, moving towards her, his hands stuffed in his pockets. His lips tingled as he wondered what it would be like to kiss her.

Faye gulped at the sudden lump in her throat. Don't come any closer, she thought in panic. She backed away from him until she felt the wall at her back. Please don't come any closer.

Spike followed her as she backed away. He was so close that he could feel the heat emanating from her body.

"Faye, I'm sorry. And … thanks for watching out for me."

Her eyes widened. Did he just apologize to her? The lunkhead never apologized to anyone for his actions. She gulped as he came even closer and wrapped his arms around her.

"I'm sorry," he whispered as he breathed in the scent of her hair. "I won't break your heart…I knowthat's what you're thinking."

Faye stiffened at his words. "You lunkhead!" she exclaimed, pushing him away. "Do you think I'm stupid? Is this your way of handling me? If you think this is going to change anything, you're sadly mistaken!"

Spike hesitated, then gathered her in his arms again. "Faye, I'm sorry."

Faye tried to pull away, but he wouldn't let her go. She could feel his heartbeat against her chest, slow and steady. He was really here, holding her. He came back, he was here now. She finally allowed herself to relax in his embrace as she felt the warmth of him.

"I don't want you to die," she whispered against his shirt, feeling the tears prickling in her eyes. "I don't want you to leave again."

Spike tightened his grip around her waist. "Faye, I'm here," he whispered against her hair. "I'm not going anywhere."