Dysfunctional [New Girl]

"Nobody Would Believe We Were Dating."

Clarke had a knack for running behind schedule for pretty much everything. For a woman with a stupendous talent to always know exactly when to take something out of the oven, she was horrible at managing time in every other aspect of her life. Which is why Schmidt got saddled with the task of making sure their friend was ready to go now that they had the Jess situation under control. To say Clarke was annoyed with his constant badgering was an understatement.

"You have two minutes left to decide on a dress and then it's time to fix that rat's nest you're currently calling a hairstyle. Good god woman, how did you even manage to do that?"

Letting out a yawn, Clarke winced when the fingers she was running through her hair got caught in a rather large tangle. "Vaughn kept me late last night to finish morning prep since I had to call off, the asshole. That whole place would burn to the ground without me." She paused to yawn again, "I didn't have time for my nighttime shower and skincare routine that you so 'nicely' put together for me."

Schmidt let out an exasperated sigh at her air quotes around the word nicely, "Someone has to make sure you take care of yourself while you die at that terrible hell hole you call a job. It certainly isn't going to be that mysterious boyfriend of yours that we've never met."

"Can it, you all get to meet him at the wedding, alright?" She rolled her eyes, still mildly dreading the decision to let the guys meet her newest fling. "He's meeting us there after he gets done with work."

"You just had to bring your new boy toy - Jess isn't ready to run interference on Caroline for Nick. It should have been you!"

Clarke stepped out of the closest in her final dress choice, earning a nod from the man laying on her bed. With that ticked off her very short, pre-wedding list, Clarke sat down and began messing with her hair. "Nobody would believe we were dating - especially not Caroline. I think it's for the best that Jess pretends to be his girlfriend today."

Schmidt nodded, "True. No one would believe that Nick could date someone that far out of his league."

She glanced over her shoulder to send him a smile. "Aw, that's so sweet. And Schmidt, when you're back in the loft, can you do me a favor?"

"Jar?"

Clarke nodded, "Jar."

The duo eventually vacated the apartment and met up with the rest of the crew in front of the loft. Thankfully they were carpooling to the wedding, so there was time to finish coaching Jess on how to deal with the Nick/Caroline fiasco that was bound to happen. When they finally parked and started walking towards the wedding venue, Clarke and the others felt slightly better about how Jess would deal with it all - only slightly though.

"Where is this mystery man of yours?" Jess nudged Clarke in the side, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively.

The other woman laughed, waving her off. "You're not allowed to be weird about him too. It's bad enough as is having to worry about the guys!"

"Come on, Clarke! You haven't told us anything about him."

Giving a shrug, Clarke refused to elaborate on the matter as her eyes scanned the crowd of wedding goers walking into the venue. After a few moments of searching, her eyes caught sight of the man in question her friends had been pestering her about. His eyes found hers and after what looked like very heated parting words, he hung up and approached the group. Wrapping an arm tightly around Clarke's waist, the newcomer pulled her in for a very passionate and prolonged kiss - the likes of which earned whistles from her friends.

Clearing her throat, Clarke gave an awkward smile to her friends. "Guys, this is Edison Turner. Edison, these are my friends."

"Call me Eddie - Clarke has told me so much about you guys." Edison smiled good-naturedly, moving to shake hands with the guys and pulling Jess in for a quick hug. "Sorry about not meeting you at Clarke's place this morning, the other partners needed me for an important meeting."