this side of paradise l.s.

chapter i.

"how can you miss someone you've never met?
cause i need you now but i don't know you yet"
-IDK You Yet, Alexander 23

²⁸ ⃤

Harry grew up in a world surrounded by music. The hum of the wind as it slipped past the large leaves, the twinkle of the silver wind chimes his mother put up on their front porch when he was three, his older sister’s giggle when he managed to do something funny. There was music in every inhale and exhale of the Earth, every beat of a heart, snippets of conversations and nursery lines absorbing into his brain like a sponge with water. He never questioned the music the way a wolf never questioned why the moon shone every night, content enough that it existed. 

In a way, Harry was always aware he shared his head with a stranger. He had music playing in his head from the beginning, soft lullabies that lulled him to sleep as a baby and entertained him when his mother left for work and his sister went to primary school. He learned the alphabet before the rest of his classmates thanks to the sweet voice inside that sang the letters to him. He had memorized "Silent Night" while coloring outside the lines in his coloring book in 3rd grade, although it would’ve been another two years before his school had their Christmas play and Harry got the lead solo for no reason other than no one else wanted it. 

He was nine when he realized the songs inside his head weren’t normal. There was a subtle shift, where the soft melodies popular on the radio changed into something more rough and raw, heavy drums and long guitar riffs making Harry’s ears ache, but not exactly unpleasantly. He sat at the kitchen table, his maths workbook left open and half-done in front of him, frowning at nothing as he tried to mouth along to the words. 

That’s how Anne found him, her shiny brown hair pulled up in a ponytail as she pulled at her yoga clothes. “What are you doing, baby boy?” She asked him, a quizzical smile locked on her face. 

“Mummy, do you know what song this is? The one that goes -” He tried to imitate the melody, but by the incredulous look on his mum’s face, he failed terribly. 

“Where’d you hear a song like that?” She laughed. 

“Inside my head,” Harry replied, and Anne’s smile dropped. 

Harry was nine when he found out he had a soulmate. Anne had set him on her lap, running her fingers through his hair, which was getting too long now. He relaxed against her as she explained the concept, the melody in his head and her soft voice lulling him into a peace he never knew he could achieve. Harry already knew what a soulmate was. There were enough movies on the telly about beautiful girls with pretty hair falling in love with strong men who would do anything for them. Gemma didn’t like those movies much, but Harry loved watching them get their happy endings, when they would kiss after the man slid the ring on the girl’s finger and they lived happily ever after. He always wanted to live happily ever after. 

And now he could. 

Soulmates were rare. Very rare. The galaxy would expand and a star would die, and their ashes would float to earth and separate into two people. Two people who the universe decided had to be together, and the only way they could find each other was through the power of love. 

“And the music in your head,” Anne reminded him. 

And that. 

“So does that mean they can hear my thoughts?” Harry asked, concerned because he had to do a lot of multiplication tables and he didn’t want to bore his soulmate. 

“No, baby. They only hear music.”

“Just music?” He asked, thinking back to all the songs in his head, wondering if his soulmate thought he was cool when he sang along to the Spice Girls. “When am I going to meet them?”