𝐂𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐖𝐢𝐧𝐞 ➸ 𝖽.𝗌𝖺𝗅𝗏𝖺𝗍𝗈𝗋𝖾

━━ ch. 03

chapter three

"WHAT smells so good?" Leila heard behind her and glanced back to see Jackson come into the kitchen as she stirred around the side of vegetables she prepared with steak and mash potatoes.

"I didn't hear you come in," She responded, disregarding his question as she heard his keys set on the counter.

"Yeah, I wanted to surprise you with these," Leila then turned around to see a bouquet of orchids in his hands after revealing it from behind his back.

She gave a smile, knowing it was no longer genuine for him to do this, "They're beautiful," She plainly commented, "Put them by the others." She motioned over to the other side of the kitchen that had a vase of roses that he got her the other day. Flowers, she thought to herself, it's always flowers. To Leila, flowers lost its meaning. It used to be a symbol of affection and love when given, but now it's just a lousy and repetitive form of an apology.

Jackson did as she suggested, only watching her back face him as she continued to cook. "Mother says hello," He mentioned and she hummed, "She wants us to go visit her tomorrow."

"Sure," Leila quietly agreed as he stood next to her to wash his hands in the sink, "Should I bring something?"

"Maybe some cookies, you know how she loves how you make them," He told her and she hummed again before putting the food on the plates, "Want some help?"

"No, I got it," She told him, not even daring to meet his eyes. He only nodded as he sat at the table and watched Leila approach him with their food before she went back to get some wine and two glasses. When she sat down, Jackson took the bottle and filled their glasses generously.

"Logan had the nerve to ask when was the wedding," He inputted and Leila met his eyes as she took a sip from her glass, "But he got me thinking, we should set a date by now, right?"

She swallowed hard, not even knowing how to answer that. A part of her want to take her engagement ring off as her response, but the other half was to just answer as he would seem fit. She placed down her glass, her eyes now on her plate, "It's up to you."

"But it should be up to the both of us," He added, "It is our wedding."

"Does setting a date really matter?" She then wondered, glancing over at him as he began eating, "It only means we have to do a lot within that time frame."

"So, what? You want to get married when we're forty?" He asked and she shrugged as she ate a few of her vegetables.

"Doesn't sound too bad," She lightly joked, but he didn't find her words amusing, so she sighed, "This is why I said it's up to you, Jackson."

"Everything shouldn't just be up to me," He huffed, "If it were, we would have been married."

"What else do you want me to say?" She then met his eyes, growing slightly frustrated by the conversation. His family is his biggest problem beside his anger. They were the gas to his fuel, igniting every idea they had onto him in a way to make it seem like his own. Leila hated it because each thing was towards her and about their relationship.

"I want more than your stupid answers," He suddenly snapped, causing her to refrain from flinching, "Do you even want to get married?"

Not with the way your acting, Leila screamed in her head, but once again stared at her plate, "I do," She mumbled and he let out a sigh before eating, choosing to end the conversation there which she was glad for. For the next few moments, she took deep breaths to prevent herself from having a panic attack but as she continued to pick up her fork, she saw her hands were trembling. She didn't want Jackson to notice, so she placed her fork down and stood up, no longer hungry.

Though before she could leave the table, he grabbed her wrist, causing her to jump a little at his touch. She met his eyes, fear nearly engulfing her, until he looked down at her hand that held the engagement ring, "I want us to get married, and I know you want to enjoy whatever this is, but I just.. I just love you so much that I want to spend the rest of my life with you."

He stood up and took her plate to place it back down on the table so he could hold both of her hands as he stared down at her. She felt sick as he stood close to her, growing exhausted by his bipolar ways. "How about I clean up and you can take a hot bath? Sound good?"

Leila only hummed, slowly pulling her hands away before leaving him in the kitchen. She hurried up into the bathroom, almost shaken up as she locked the door behind her to set her bath. When the tub was filled with warm water, she got undressed and stepped in with attempts to calm her down.

He didn't hit you, she told herself as if that was a reason to stop shaking. Denial over time filled her head, believing that her love for him wasn't replaced by fear. She believed she only stayed because they loved each other, though she was only doing it because she was convinced that he was all she had. She didn't really have anyone in this town but him and his family- and Alaric, but she didn't find comfort in having him console her about her relationship. She felt anyone outside of their relationship would either consider her to be brainless to leave or stupid to stay.

From outside the door, she could hear his footsteps ascend up the stairs only to fade as they went into her bedroom. Leila let out a deep sigh and sunk into the tub, feeling like she was living outside of her body and that someone else had taken over. She no longer felt like how she used to be- happy.

She lowered herself until her head barely floated above the surface of the water. Her body grew numb as she let her eyes slip close before fully submerging herself under water. She wanted to cry- to scream or do anything to let out her inner pain she kept locked up tight since she was finding herself slowly imploding more and more as the days went on. Her body ached, her mind throbbed and her courage was beginning to shatter from the inside out.

She wondered how much longer will she be able to take before losing herself completely.