What a girl needs

Chapter 10

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Amelia's POV

I sat still, not being able to move, or think. 

I'm going to lose one of the most important things in my life...

James left minutes ago. I can't believe he never told me; he's the only person in this twisted family of mine who I thought I could trust, yet even he cannot be fully on my side, even he cannot be fully trusted.

I'm going to lose one of the most important things in my life...

Does it matter, though?

They're selling me all the same, so why does it matter so much if I knew or not. The more I knew, the more it hurt, so wasn't it for the best that he didn't tell me? Maybe... maybe he was just trying to protect me.

I'm going to lose one of the most important things in my life...

I can't blame him, who knows what he had to go through? Maybe he had his own reasons, however wrong they were. People do stupid things when they're hurt.

And why would anyone want to... buy me anyway. I mean, I'm fat, and ugly, and selfish, and naive...

Maybe once those people see that, they won't want me anymore. And then, I might convince them to let me go, and I'll be able to start my own life, where I might actually live for once. Maybe I can get myself a job in the time I'm gonna be with them, and raise money, so that once they kick me out, I can get myself a job, somewhere far from here, and build myself a whole different life. Away from hurt, and abuse. If all goes well, maybe I can even get my dream job of being a writer.

I could get everything I ever wanted, but only if all goes well.

And I'll make sure it does.

With that thought in mind, I decided there is no use in staying here anymore, so I got up and went to the bathroom to freshen up.

Tired eyes stared back at me in the glass mirror. When I was younger, I used to admire some of my physical features, thinking that I'm not completely hideous. But now... I can't help but find everything about me plain, insignificant and ugly.

That's good, I told myself, it means I can get away quicker.

Sighing, I washed my face, letting the cold water soothe my skin, before grabbing a towel and drying my face with it.

I re-applied some mascara, eyeliner and lip-gloss, before going downstairs.

When I got there, everyone was in the living room. The tension was so thick, you could practically cut it with a feather. I kept my head down, not wanting to look anyone in the eye, afraid of what I would see.

Judgement, maybe a tiny bit of pity, anger, disgust, and some more judgement for safe measure.

I didn't have to look up to know that's what I would find.

"Look who decided to grace us with her presence." I heard my father's voice say, sarcasm dripping from every word.

"Sorry father, I, um, I had to..."

Cry my eyes out for a bit? Offered my subconscious.

Haha, very funny.

"...get some fresh air." was my pathetic excuse.

 Forget the fact that I was still inside the house.

"Well then, me, your mother and the Jones had a very important announcement to make, before you 'went for some fresh air'."

He walked over to me, opening his arms and hugging me. 

Oookay, where did that come from?

However, when he pulled back, he kept a hand around my arm, faking a smile. He leaned in again, his grip on my arm painfully tight, and whispered in my ear so that only I could hear,

"I'll pay you for that little dramatic act you did there, but first, be a good and obedient girl, so you won't make complete fools of ourselves." 

I gulped, but obeyed. 

Again.

Isn't that all I'm good for?

My sperm donor opened his mouth again.

"Well, we wanted to wait a little bit more before announcing this, but, the... um... circumstances are causing our plans to mix up. Still, there is no better time to say this than now. My darling daughter, you are lucky enough to marry this young man called Dylan Jones. I think we should all now celebrate this happy day by opening one of our many collections of Champagne, don't you think, Milly?"

There it was. He said it. I'm going to marry this guy. This guy I know nothing about is going to be my future husband.

Fine piece of meat, if you ask me.

But I didn't ask you, now, did I?

Okay, now I seriously need to stop talking to myself.

What was dad saying? Oh, yeah. Champagne. Ugh.

"Of course." Wow, I actually managed to say this without my voice breaking.

"Well, what are we waiting for, come on."

I resisted the urge to sigh. Barely.