Grief

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Rose's POV
"Where are you going.. oh my God Jenna!" yelled my so called grandmother pushing me aside to get her off from the bathtub who was coughing for absolutely no reason. Whereas I blocked off the situation which was going out in my background and I concentrated on finding my hijab because I knew that I really had to go out from this house.

"WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM YOU STUPID BITCH!!!!" shouted my grandmother,harshly turning me towards her holding my hair which started to throb as my Leukemia pain started to kick in.

Come on,fight for it

"WHAT!!" I shouted back yanking her hand from her hair,as I moved backwards and tried to use my hand to defend myself from a single bit from her. Well this was usually the way I used to save myself from Kam's  abuse so yeah.  "Why would you hit her in this way?!" she screamed as my heart beats started to increase.

"Well that's my house and I know what to do and what not" I replied,massaging the part of my head which throbbed. Without any warning a hard stinging feeling crawled up my cheeks as her thick hand  came into contact with my cheeks and I fell down crashing my head on to my dressing table,dropping all of my nail polishes.

"I don't understand the fact that who had ever asked your mother to give birth to such an insolent girl like you! No wonder you have cancer! You deserve this!" she said breaking my heart into pieces and I swear I could feel the pieces of my heart piercing my skin as the shards of broken glass.

"I don't know,why am I even staying in this home" I replied as a tear escaped my eyelids and I could feel my head and cheek to throb. A hot liquid which I assumed was blood was slowly now coming through my lips. "Who has asked you to be here anyways with me?" she replied as I nodded and took my phone and walked out of my house.

I straight up started walking towards the place where I usually find peace. As I walked I realized the sky no longer seemed limitless or the chirping of the birds which were once my favorite were no longer a music to my ears. It all felt so dark and suffocating in here. Not from the brain which was at least alive and active,but from my mental state.

My tears wanted to roll down, but they are too stubborn. As if they were stuck in some traffic jam and if they drive out of my eyes during a red signal someone might fine me. My face wants to grimace and contort into a painful expression, but the fake smile that has been plastered since years seems to have frozen in place.

I switched the airplane mode of my phone and continued to walk with the intention of not using my mobile phone other than using it for the music.

All the social media page's quotes,watching other's happy smiley Instagram stories,their Facebook statuses about whom checked in where does disappoints and makes you freaking sad. No,if you are thinking that this might be a jealousy,then no, you are so wrong. This isn't jealousy,I don't know what the hellthis is,but I can be sure about a thing that it is not jealousy.

My head felt so freaking crowded at the moment that I just started to walk out without my hijab or anything. My head flew into different directions as the cold air hit my face and I was hugging myself out of the chills the winter air gave me. I wasn't able to hear anything,all I heard was my huge footsteps and my heartbeat which felt as if it was going to break through my rib cage.

'I cannot be so weak and vulnerable,no the world can't see me being so weak' I said to myself and started increase my pace. Wasn't able to figure it out,that was it because of the fight between me and Eran,or today's sickness of mine or Jenna messing with me,or the heartbreaking argument with my grandmother.

Me and my grandmother were never into a good terms. Unfortunately she belongs to a gender racist nation so when I was born it turned out to be the biggest humiliation and a nightmare for her as she was so highly excited for a male person to be born. And that's why she showers her entire love to her elder grandson,I mean my elder brother.

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