Enjoy this very short crack fic
Klaus walked into Walmart and grabbed a cart. It was just 8 days until Christmas and he still hasn't bought his family presents. Once he got everything he needed he walked to the toys to find something for Claire. Klaus picked a toy flamingo that pooped. Claire should like that right. Almost directly next to it there was a baby doll in a tropical themed dress with brown hair and large green eyes. She had a small mixer and two packets of "food" and two diapers with feeding utensils. Her box said "Baby Alive". Klaus looked in his wallet he would have enough money still if he added the doll to his cart.
"Something for myself wouldn't hurt" he said and the doll went into the cart. Klaus added some food packets and baby diapers then a toy crib and high chair then checked out.
Klaus put all the presents under the tree and began to unbox his doll in the living room. Then a blue light came and left.
"You know it's rude to open other people's presents"
"Christ on a cracker we need to put a bell on you" Klaus squawked
"Put a bell on me and I will chew off your hand" Five hissed then he leaned over to look at the doll who's hair Klaus was combining "what the hell is that anyway"
"Her name is Clarice I bought her earlier"
"And you bought her for yourself"
"Yes"
"How sober are you"
"Sober as a naked soldier riding a rhinoceros on Mars in July singing Dancing Queen while holding a baby penguin" that made Five blink away while shaking his head
"Ugh time travelers am I right"
You are a time traveler
"Stop or no um broccoli for you!" Klaus yelled
"Master Klaus are you alright"
"Of course I am Pogo"
"What is that thing" Pogo said thing with disgust which he has never done "on the table"
"This is Clarice I discovered her earlier at the Walmart"
That statement made Pogo walk away. Being a talking half ape and half human Pogo has had his fair share of weird things but for some reason this one really got to Pogo. It was mainly the dolls presence. That doll scared the shit out of him. Klaus saying discovered reminded Pogo of Dolores, who somehow was less creepy. Pogo for some reason just couldn't stand Clarice. The name even bothers him.
Why are people bothered by Clarice? Klaus wondered
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