Potions - Sirius Black

Chapter 2- Amortentia

For the rest of the day both Sirius and Gracie were in foul moods. Heartbroken and sulking all over the place, ignoring the pitiful gazes from their friends as they moped and grieved over the loss of their relationship. Sneaking glances at each other every so often hoping the other was messing only just missing them barely and ending up disappointed as each thought that the other did not care.

The two were originally partnered up in potions, however after last nights events, Remus and Peter took it upon themselves to switch seats with one half of the couple. Gracie now being placed with Peter and Remus with Sirius. James was partnered with his usual Ravenclaw partner and Lily with Alice. Every one of the friends held solemn looks on their faces as they witnessed and almost felt the heartbreak of their two closest mates. 

"Ah Miss Burgess!" chuckled Slughorn "What on earth are you doing sat next to mr Pennyworth?" 

"Pettigrew professor" she corrected the man in her friends defence 

"Oh yes, my apologies Paul." he said nodding to Peter as Remus and James snickered Sirius not even bothering to look up from the desk that he was numbly staring at. "Why are you not sat next to Mr Black?!" he exclaimed in confusion making people across the room wince at the question looking at the boy to see his reaction but he did not flinch. 

Peter interrupted the man sensing the girls discomfort swiftly changing the subject. "Hey Sir what's that?" he asked pointing to the cauldron at the front of the room that seemingly had a pearlescent pink steam floating off of it despite already knowing the answer. 

"That's amortentia obviously" scoffed the Ravenclaw besides James "It's only the most powerful love potion in the world, smells like whatever attracts you the most..like right now I can smell...ginger, toffee and...cut grass?" momentarily locking eyes with a blonde boy across the room quickly averting her gaze as a blush crept onto her cheeks. 

"But it doesn't create real love" said Lily quickly correcting the girl "So I'd hardly call it a love potion..its more like the imperious curse in liquid form.." she said noticing the glances that several girls threw toward Sirius and James as they heard the words 'love potion'. "It creates more of a deep infatuation or obsession..and it can be very dangerous..if a child were to be conceived under a love potion the consequences can be disastrous" 

"Beautifully explained, both of you!" praised the professor "five points to each of your houses" he smiled jovially "We shall not be brewing amortentia for obvious reasons, but I would like a few of you to tell us what it is you can smell, who wants to go first?" several hands shot up across the room and Slughorns eyes grazed over each student until his eyes rested on a mop of black hair. "Mr Black! How about you? Though I'm sure we all know who you'll be smelling" chuckled the man obliviously 

"No thanks." said Sirius bluntly his eyes full of despair "I can smell it from here"

"Well why don't you tell us what you smell?" the man encouraged 

"You said you already know the answer so why are you asking?" 

"I-well" choked the professor slightly taken aback by Sirius' tone of voice, it was unusual for the boy to snap and use that tone, he was usually so happy and full of life, but right now he was far from it. But as he looked between Sirius and Gracie who both looked heartbroken he seemed to put the pieces together and made a mental note to ask Minerva about it later. "Miss Evans, why don't you have a go?" 

Lily nodded sending a sad sympathetic smile towards Sirius to which he responded with a tight lipped smile of his own. "Well..I smell spearmint toothpaste, sleakeasys hair potion and....broomstick polish?" Gracie's eyes shot up at the sound of this knowing exactly who Lily was smelling. And momentarily a smirk etched itself onto her face ready to teased her friend instinctively looking towards Sirius as she usually would when something to do with Lily and James occurred only to find him already looking at her longingly and sadly. 

She was right there in front of him and all he wanted to do was hold her in his arms and tell her he loved her. But he couldn't. Not anymore. Ever again. and thats what hurt the most. It was as if the universe was taunting him to a point that he almost wished she had died, at least then he wouldn't be tormented and tortured with the knowledge that she was right there but he couldn't have her. So he stared as her taking in her beauty as much as he could. Her long blonde hair that cascaded down her back falling into its delicate curls. Her glowing complexion that made her look like an angel. Her plump, soft, pillowy lips that looked as if one kiss would be all that it took to make a man fall deeply in love with her. Her gorgeous forest green eyes complimented by her long dark black eyelashes. She was the epitome of an angel, a goddess, an ethereal being. She was so perfect it didn't seem real.

And as he looked at her he thought about the stolen kisses that they used to share. And the way she would laugh when they were together. How her smile was bright enough to illuminate the sky. He thought about when they were twelve years old and he had the biggest crush on her and how nervous he got when he asked her on a date, which they spent in the great hall sitting next to each other at lunch, and the happiness he felt when she agreed with blushing red cheeks Lily and Alice giggling by her side. "W-Wow!" he had said when she agreed "Thanks". He remembered their first kiss in third year on his fourteenth birthday when she had pecked him very quickly it was over before he could register what was happening. He remembered their fourth year when they were running around hogsmeade laughing and joking together as he pulled her into an Alley placing a firm kiss on her lips. He remembered when she discovered Remus' lycanthropy and the boys intentions to become animagus' and she helped them every step of the way. He remembered the moment he realised that she was the girl that her wanted to marry and he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her when she was helping clean the boys' wounds after a rough full moon. He remembered their first times. "Are you ready?" he had asked her "Yes" she had replied kissing him softly as they gave their whole to each other. He remembered the first time she said I love you "I love you" she mumbled into his chest after one of their fights "W-what?" he said in shock Gracies face paled and she stuttered looking like a blabbering mess until he pulled her into a kiss "I love you too" .

But now he looked at her with a broken heart as he remembered the past four years with her, wishing for a way to make things better. To get her back. But we all want what we can't have. And Sirius Black could not have Gracie Burgess. 

She stared back at him with the same heartbroken and longing eyes, as she too remembered everything, regretting her decision to leave him for good immensely but she constantly reminded herself 'its for the best' and 'He will be happier this way'. But the more she tried to convince herself the less believable it seemed to be as she began to wonder. Was it really better this way? Or was she lying to herself?