Skulduggery Pleasant Spoof: The Holiday

Chapter Two: The Flight

Within 20 minutes they were on the plane and seated and even before the plane took off things were already going badly.

There were two seats in a row and Valkyrie and Skulduggery were seated next to each other.

In front of them China and Tanith were seated beside each other and behind them Ghastly and Fletcher.

“Are we there yet?” Fletcher asked about two minutes after sitting down.

“We haven’t even taken off yet,” Valkyrie said.

“Oh.”

“Hey China, why are you putting on make-up and brushing your hair?” Tanith asked.

“Because beauty doesn’t take a holiday,” China replied, “But of course you wouldn’t know that.”

“And what’s that supposed to mean?” There was something in Tanith’s voice that told Valkyrie something bad was about to happen.

“Isn’t it obvious?”

“I really hope that you aren’t saying what I think you’re saying for your sake.”

“Oh I’m saying what you think I’m saying.”

“You little-”

The plane’s engines drowned out Tanith’s voice as the plane started and the intercom came on.

“We are about to take off so please fasten your seatbelts,” the lady on the inter com said.

Valkyrie fastened her seat belt as China and Tanith continued to argue.

She could tell that they were starting to yell at each other but luckily the plane managed to drown them out.

Valkyrie felt her ears pop and she was able to tell that China and Tanith didn’t notice the change in pressure because they were too busy screaming at each other.

Finally the lady came back on the inter com and told them that they could now move about the cabin.

The engines quieted down and Valkyrie now could hear how large and colorful China and Tanith’s vocabulary really was.

“Are we there yet?” Fletcher’s obnoxious voice said suddenly from behind her.

Valkyrie sighed in annoyance, “We just took off.”

“So are we there yet?”

“No,” Skulduggery answered, “we still have 20 more hours of flying.”

Just at that moment China and Tanith’s voices broke through the quieting engines.

Skulduggery covered Valkyrie ears.

“China!” he said angrily, “Tanith! Language!”

When they ignored him he sighed and gave Valkyrie some ear phones then motioned to pick out a movie.

Valkyrie took the head phones and put them on and choose Finding Nemo.

After a few minutes of watching the movie she felt someone breathing down her neck.

Valkyrie turned around and saw Fletcher watching over her shoulder.

She took her hand and pushed his face away.

After the movie finished she looked up in time to see China and Tanith now whapping each other’s hands and squealing.

Valkyrie looked at Skulduggery and raised an eyebrow.

Skulduggery shook his head in a gesture that said ‘don’t interfere.’

Valkyrie nodded back.