1.new york, new york

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Wolf's POV
N.Y. Spanish Harlem
October 30

Not a day goes by that I don't think about her.

Minutes, hours, days, months, years might pass by— but she'll always be there, stuck on my mind like a song on repeat. And I'm calm— these have been the three, longest months of my life— and God knows I've been calm. Patient. Lingering for the moment I get to see her even if it's from afar. But nothing. Three months, and nothing. It's gone from summer to fall and she's still in Puerto Rico, ignoring my calls, my messages. I even flew there and her grandparents told me she wasn't home, but I'm certain she was, because I always know where she's at. And, I really— well, sort of— understand why she doesn't want to have anything to do with me, but part of it was real, right? When we made love, our kisses and few but deep conversations. If none of it was, and if she honestly doesn't want to ever hear from me again, than why hasn't she taken the tracking chip out of her neck? Victor confessed it to her the moment she was conscious again. He surprisingly was the only one she wanted to talk to the moment she woke up— but, she decided to keep it on. Why? Why is she playing with me like this? Why can't she at least tell me if I have the slightest chance...

Jesus Christ I need to know.

Wolf, don't play naïve. She's probably making you pay for all YOU put her through: a drowning experience with Antonella, two stabs, one from the Gladiatrix and the other— I mute my subconscious. It has been really loud lately.

My jaw twitches as I start replaying everything that happened at Sicily. At least what I know, there are still many things I need to solve and questions that need to be answered. And one of the most important ones, who stabbed her at the sex dungeon at Suscitato during the fire?

Tame that rising anger, Wolf, you can do it...

After I got shot, Russo miraculously decided to throw me like a piece of garbage in front of Palermo's hospital; I was there in a coma for three weeks. When I woke up the doctor himself was surprised, explaining to me how I only had a 2% chance of surviving and pulled through. I wasn't surprised though, didn't he see the other 5 bullet hole scars on my torso?

Mr. and Mrs.Carter were there the moment my eyes opened, so was Pearl and Ruby, the Carter's youngest daughter. They had flown from New York to Sicily the minute Detective Bruno called them with the news about Pearl, Jade and my "accident". He decided to take credit for everything, which included tracking down Gian and finding all those missing women and girls he had imprisoned for sex trafficking purposes. But, we all know in reality that he didn't do shit, just accuse Victoria of Richard Arnault's death and find Suscitato and the Cimorelli Chateau burning to pieces.

Pearl, on the other hand, had already spent three weeks with the Carters when I regained consciousness. They told me she and Jade were mostly in shock and hadn't spoken much. Liam, the Carter's oldest son, who's a psychiatrist, explained that it would be normal. They lived hell for 11 years and things we could never imagine. So nobody pressured them, and all of a sudden it actually felt as if Pearl had never left, as if it had all been a terrible nightmare; and the Carters couldn't be more grateful to have their daughter and newly met granddaughter back home.

But there I was, only thinking about her, feeling incomplete, lost. How the hell could this woman in a matter of days get under my skin the way she did? Make me feel the way she did? I swear her dark eyes hunt me day and night. And I'll do anything to win her back, I don't care what it takes. The moment Victor and I were able to be alone he told me everything about how Gian tortured her, how he found her restrained from the ceiling, topless, blood running down her back to her toes. He also told me how she finished killing Gian and that he found her almost dead in the fire afterwards, stabbed by God knows who. I'll never forgive myself for not being there for her; it was all so complicated that I felt that the only way out was if I was dead. I thought that was the only way to save her and the rest. Was I wrong? Would things have gone better if I had stayed and fought?

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