baby hazel [ the fanfic ]

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Baby Hazel, a sweet and naive baby-

No. Too many lies in that sentence alone. First of all, Hazel isn't a baby, and second, how is she "sweet and naive"? She knows too much for her age, not sure how but it's most likely that goddamn phone of hers.

She has a lot of friends, one of them being Bella.

Bella. Hazel really didn't call her a friend but more of a frienemy. You see, Hazel and Bella have been friends for about 2 years. The thing is, she has a boyfriend. It's so annoying to hear Bella talk about her boyfriend all the time.

Hazel goes to preschool for the first time and she finally got the attention of her crush, Jake. Even though he has a girlfriend, Jake innocently took Hazel's attempts of flirting as compliments. It then turns out that his girlfriend was her 'best friend' Bella. 

She found out that her parents were getting a divorce, and so her mother will go to find another partner while Hazel and her brother lives with their dad and step mom.

Just a clarification, this fic wasn't meant to mock any of the characters or the company behind it. Please understand. Also, this fic is made as a joke, the plot and everything so don't take it seriously ... Contains heavy cursing in some parts!

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hey yall i just wanted to say that i started this fic a LONG time ago so if the plot is shit you know why. plus the capitalization of the first 3 chapters which i don't really do anymore ok!! this'll be one hell of a ride so just bear with me :)

i spent my time learning the baby hazel lore and going on girlsgogames so please appreciate the effort i put into this even though it's supposed to be satire lmao

no this isn't a skz fanfic lol you read the title.. sorry stays

(requested by my irls whom ive pushed into the baby hazel universe say hi!!!)

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─ main characters

Hazel, around 5 years old, the main character of this fic whose also the main star of the game series, baby hazel, which was popularized through online gaming sites such as Girls Go Games. She has the sassiness of an average pick me girl and she's definitely a girl boss. 

Bella, who is Hazel's ex-friend. She's your average high school mean girl bully who loves to be passive-aggressive to everyone she comes into contact with. Except, well, she's a toddler. But in this universe, every toddler has the mindset of a high schooler!!

Jake, the love interest of the two main girls in this fic. He seems to be a clueless nice guy every kid would fall in love with. Many would describe him to be dumb but he's one of the smartest kids in the preschool. You know, he's just a dork with the face of Ed Sheeran.

Mia, Hazel's best friend who's very outgoing. She first met Hazel at her tea party in which she invited all of her neighbors to join. They became inseparable from that point onwards. The two are deskmates at their preschool. 

Hazel's Mom (Jenna), a slender 37-year-old woman with blond hair, brown eyes, and a distinctive look. She has plans on getting a divorce with her husband since she has suspected him to have been dating another woman.

Hazel's Teacher (Brooklyn), a 34-year-old woman who works as an English teacher at Hazel's preschool. She's labelled as 'that one hot teacher' or even more so a 'milf' with her fairly short skirt and her 'divorced' status. She seems like a genuinely nice person, but you'll never know.

Other characters that I won't go into too much detail: Matt, Bethany, Akito, Kenny, Kayla, Hazel's Dad, Hazel's Cousin.