Gold to Airy Thinness Beat

Chapter Five

She didn't leave immediately.

Dr. Erskine gave her a few days to get things in order and to also see that Bucky's affairs were taken care of. She packed up everything from her small apartment and moved it in boxes to Bucky's. She didn't bother unpacking them, just stacked them all up in an unused room he had in the back. She added their wedding certificate and almost threw in her ring, only to change her mind at the last second and keep it. She didn't want to wear it, her hope still to keep some distance between her and Bucky in the event things blew up in her face, but he'd had his when he left and she felt wrong leaving hers behind.

Dr. Erskine introduced her to a man he'd gotten to watch over Bucky's place, and also get rid of hers. He would collect any mail for either her or Bucky and keep it until they got back. The man looked as she imagined a spy would but denied it when asked, of course. He promised the place would be in flawless condition when she got back, looking her straight in the eye and shaking her hand with a firm grip.

She didn't eat the day she left, her stomach tied in too many knots to get anything down. Instead she simply packed a bag and made her way to the train station once again. She'd cut her hair even shorter than before and wore clothing a size too big to hide what few curves she did have. She'd taped her almost non-existent breasts down to truly non-existent, ensuring that even were someone to stumble and fall against her they'd be unlikely to feel anything that might give her away.

And so Stephanie Barnes faded away somewhere on that train platform and Steve Rogers was born.

And as the train pulled out of the station, leaving the only home she'd ever known behind her, and as it set in that she was really, truly, actually doing this, Stephanie could only think of one, inescapable, truth.

Bucky was absolutely going to kill her when he found out.

***

Boot camp...was pretty much what she expected.

The other soldiers weren't happy with her, mainly due to her perceived special status in sleeping in Dr. Erskine's lab, and not because of her size. It was oddly refreshing, if still annoying.

Many acted as if she simply didn't exist. They didn't look at her, didn't respond to her if she asked a question, got up and moved if she sat near them.

Others made snide comments, usually under their breath, when she was nearby. That sort of thing she was more used too. Usually she'd have responded back with something snide, or outright gone after them, but she was in the military and expected to behave so she held herself back, with considerable effort. There was also the fact she was supposed to be male and the less she stood out the less risk of being found out, at least until Dr. Erskine did whatever he planned to do that he promised would make her gender irrelevant. It was hard. She couldn't even verbally respond to the bullying because it would risk escalating the problem, and because no matter how much she tried to deepen her voice when she spoke it still sounded jarringly female to her ears. So not only did she have to let others aggravate her, she had to stay quiet about it. Bucky would have been doubled over with laughter, once he'd finished dealing with the bullies and yelling at her for being there in the first place.

The only real problem she had was with one soldier and his cronies. Gilmore Hodge was not only a bully; he was proud of it. On her first day, lining up with the other new recruits, he spotted her and gave her the same look a predator would prey. Normally Stephanie would have met his gaze head on but she'd forced herself to focus on the ground, trying her best to not draw unnecessary attention to herself.

A car pulled up and she raised her head just in time to see the door open and a woman get out. Not just any woman either, she found out soon after, but Agent Peggy Carter.