7. Crashing of Waves

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Suresh:

I was sitting on the couch reading a book on my iPad. I wasn't really reading I was merely contemplating. It was late at night, and everyone had retired post dinner, when Abhi and Alia left. I have known both Pragya and Bulbul for a fairly long time, and I could tell, both were not being themselves today. Bulbul was trying too hard it seemed, to show how happy she was with Abhi, but I could sense, the happiness didn't reach her eyes. Pragya on the other hand, has maintained a certain distance with me for years, punishing me for a crime I am not aware of. She has been the perfect home-maker, the perfect daughter-in-law, sister-in-law and the most perfect mother. She has performed all the duties of a wife with utmost reverence. But she and shut herself from me, it has been too long to reconcile, and I have accepted this. Therefore, it didn't make sense for her to show so much possessiveness towards me in the evening. Who was it aimed at, I wondered. One would imagine, Pragya to show this possessiveness before Mish, knowing our history, but Pragya has always been alert and indifferent of me in her presence – never over bearing, but keeping an eye all the same. Who else was there for her to act then? I could imagine, Bulbul trying to show off her happiness before me, but I couldn't place Pragya's reaction, and that bothered me.

***

Bulbul:

I was lying down on my bed, sleep had evaded me. Staring at the dark ceiling above my head and seeing the rickety old fan slowly move in circular motion, I realised something was bothering me. I wasn't feeling okay; I turned to see Mumma sleeping peacefully next to me. I sighed, maybe it was the exhaustion of waking up so early today due to Suresh, I mean Jiju's arrival.

Suresh...I had seen him today after a long time; age has finally caught up with him. I could see the fine wrinkles around his eyes when he smiled looking at us in the dawn hours of today. I think I noticed a few grey strands in his sideburns too, but even then he managed to look handsome as ever – like he always did. We spent a couple of hours without Di's overbearing presence, even though in separate rooms and Mumma wide wake and next to me, but it was still something, that time. Agreed, Di never verbally stopped me from meeting or talking to Suresh; I personally didn't prefer meeting him alone after Di & his wedding, but I had to, when Aadi was born.

Flashback: 10years backs

It was during the time when Di was pregnant with Aadi. She was in her last few weeks into delivery and Mumma was supposed to go and stay with her. Until then, Suresh's mother was there to look after her, but now with Ritika's examination nearing, she had to return and Mumma had dutifully decided to be there for Di. However, our plans went kaput when, a couple of days before her date of traveling, on her way back from the super-market, Mumma tripped and fell and suffered from a ligament tear in her ankle.

Di needed support, Suresh alone wasn't enough, he had to go to work leaving Di alone, and she had a complicated pregnancy, now with Mumma advised against travelling or too much work, there was no option but for me to travel to Di. It was the need of the hour, the baby needed it, hence I went against the wish of everyone including me. This was the first time I was spending so much time with Suresh after his marriage with Di, and we had started off with Suresh being very cold towards me. To this day, I wish, only if we could be that cold throughout my stay at theirs. But as luck would have it, at that point of time, his coldness bothered me, blame me for it, but I was young and naïve, my head was filled with the pride of breaking up with him for an 'honourable' reason, hence I didn't like it, when I started living with them, living with the true consequences of my decision, living with a Suresh that was cold and un caring of me. Hence out of pride in my youth I had made the disastrous mistake of telling Suresh one fine evening when Di had gone to bed early, the real reason for me leaving him.

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