cell room outburst

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Eren sits in his cell, shirtless, after lashing out at Hanji. His hair was put into a ponytail and he sits on the edge of his bed not doing anything but thinking - feeling numb.

"You have thirty minutes." Eren hears a voice outside the door of the cell rooms. 'Great... more visitors.' he thinks to himself. The door creeps open. Him about to groan and glare into annoyance was only met by the presence of a girl he so dearly loved and his glare softened.

"Hey..." she greets quietly and tries to put on a smile but her eyes tell a different story. She takes a seat on the bench infront of his cell bars and looks at him, "I like your hair." she compliments.

"Thanks..." he quietly mumbles. "What are you doing here?" he asks with concern in his eyes and humiliation all over his face. Y/n only looks down.

"I don't know... I just wanted to see you. I haven't seen you in a long time..." y/n answers quietly. "I can leave if you want-"

"Stay."

Leave. Don't look at me.

Eren knew she didn't deserve to be in the presence of him but he wanted her more than ever. He just wanted to be loved again. Or at least feel love again. Y/n looks up at Eren as he avoided her gaze by staring at the ground. Y/n eventually gives him a weak smile and mutters an 'ok'.

"How is your retirement...?" Eren asks, still looking at the ground.

Y/n sighs, "I have decided to work at a tea shop in Shiganshina... Living a quiet life, collecting herbs, drinking tea while staring out at the sunset. I like my life. This is the most peace I've ever felt... other than when I was a naive little girl who was homeless..." y/n answers and Eren smiles just barely while listening to y/n rant and still staring at the ground. "How was Marley?" y/n asks and Eren's little smile fades away.

"It was boring. I only pretended to be a fallen soldier. Nothing interesting like peacefully selling tea to customers." Eren answers and y/n nods. There was now a sorta' awkward moment of silence between them. They didn't know what to talk about, all they did was stare at the ground and every so often would glance at each other out of the corner of their eye until y/n finally spoke up...

"Hey, Eren?" y/n asks and Eren looks up at her in acknowledgement, "I remember... before I retired, I said that I didn't want to fight anymore... And you promised that one day I won't have to fight anymore. What do you mean by that? What are you planning?" y/n asks and Eren only looks at her plainly with a hint of sorrow in his face.

"I told you not to worry about it." Eren says a little bit of harshness in his tone.

I told you to look away.

"Eren... please just talk to me. I am worried about it whether you like it or not. Please just talk to me. I'll listen." y/n reassures and Eren's lips tremble as he listens to her words.

"Just please... Just please stop. Go away." Eren asks almost like he was about to break.

Look away...

"Please, Eren. I just want to understand. I just want to help-"

"Go away!" Eren yelled at y/n harshly. Once Eren catches a good look at what y/n's reaction was, her looking at him in fear and confusion, his glare transformed to the same expression as hers. "I'm... I'm sorry."

I'm so sorry, y/n.

Y/n stares at him with complete shock to his outburst before getting up and leaving the cell room. Eren stares at the door for a moment before sitting back down on the edge of his bed.

I am an idiot while you are a beauty.

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