Apparently, I'm Dead

Chapter Sixteen

Happy New Year! Good Riddance to 2020, and here's hoping 2021 will be at least a tiny bit better. I didn't update the past 2(?) weeks because, you know, holidays and New Years. Hopefully, this chapter is pretty good!

SAMIRAH

"Percy!" I tsk, shaking my head and peering over the edge of the branch to see Magnus fall into Vanaheim, shrieking.

"Whaaat?" he asks, a little smile on his face. "I got him where he wanted to go."

I roll my eyes and push him over. He salutes as he falls, a smirk tilting his mouth.

I jump in after him. I land with a thump on a grassy hill. I hear various landing noises from everyone else, and I see Percy and Magnus snickering to each other on the top of the hill. Magnus smacks the back of Percy's head, then Percy elbows him in the ribs.

"Boys," I say, standing right behind them. "While I hate to interrupt this budding romance, we should get going sometime before next year." I smile at Magnus's shriek and Percy's intake of breath, both of them reaching for their weapons.

"But Saaaaaaam," Magnus whines, "Vanaheim is boooooooring."

Percy looks at Magnus in askance. "Vanaheim is literally an entire world. It can't all be boring. Also, didn't you say it was like Valhalla? Valhalla is not boring at all."

"I was going to say it's like Valhalla, because it's a land of the dead, but it's basically a party land where everyone gives everyone else compliments, and no one kills anyone else. So, boring."

Percy hums non-committedly.

I stride forward, muttering under my breath about what idiots boys are. As we walk, people begin to show up in our path.

"Hey, dudes and dudettes. Like, groovy weapons ya got there." says a sunbathing dead guy to all of us. "Why are there so many of you?"

"We're trying to get to Freya's palace," I state. "How do we get there?"

"Hmm," he yawns. "You go over there," he says, pointing at a hill with a pink tree that looks like it came out of a Dr. Seuss book. "And then you go to the upside down boat. And that's where Freya is."

I shrug, then walk over to the truffula tree hill. Blitz straggles behind, walking slowly, barely moving. "Alex," I whisper. She looks at me. I jerk my head at Blitz. She rolls her eyes and falls into step with the dwarf. She engages him in conversation about fashion, and soon they're chatting away near the head of the group.

Percy looks at them, then looks at me. He smiles, then nods approvingly. "Nicely done," he mutters to me.

I feel pride bubble up in me. Percy has this way of making you feel as if you've solved world hunger with just a few choice words or gestures. "Thanks," I murmur back.

He seems to be about to say something else, but he interrupts himself with almost a gasp. A "Whoa," pours from his mouth. He seems to be admiring the upside down boat that Freya lives in. "That is totally somewhere I'd want to live."

We knock on the door. It opens on its own. We make our way down the hall. Our own footsteps and the echoes caused by them are the only thing we can hear.

We enter a room full of sunlight streaming in from the windows on the ceiling. A beautiful woman is sitting on a large throne in the back of the room. She has blonde hair which is twisted in a braid that's been thrown over her shoulder. Her blue eyes sparkle as she looks down at us. Freya- the goddess of love and beauty.

"Ah! Blitzen! How nice it is to see you again, you really should come and visit your poor mother more often. And who are your friends?" She glances at us. When her eyes meet Magnus, they light up. "Oh! And Magnus, too! Hello dear nephew, I hope you're doing well. Is there a reason for your visit?"

"Hello, Mother," Blitz mumbles.

"Um- ah- Lady Freya," Magnus stammers, trying not to stare at his aunt.

I roll my eyes. Men are so useless. "Lady Freya," I sigh, "I am Samirah Al-Abba, Odin's personal Valkyrie. We are here on a quest to put the World Serpent back to sleep. Lady Ran told us there was a sedative, and that one of the ingredients was one of your hairs. Please, Lady Freya, would you be kind enough to give us one strand of your lovely hair?"

Percy snorts quietly. "Laying on a bit thick, aren't you?" he says out of the corner of his mouth.

I glare at him. Shut up, I sign. She's vain, likes being flattered.

Freya puts a shapely hand to her mouth. "My hair? Of all things, my hair? Valkyrie, what makes you think you can ask for the hair of a goddess?"

"Lady Freya-" I begin to say.

Percy interrupts me. "Look here, Lady Freya. Now, I don't know if you care, but a giant snake just woke up. Apparently, that giant snake waking up means the end of the entire freaking world. So if you would be so kind as to provide one of the ingredients we need to stop the end of the entire freaking world, that would be pretty awesome, thanks."

Freya narrows her eyes. "Who are you?"

"Percy Jackson, son of Poseidon. Yes, I'm Greek, and yes, I'm an einherjar. Hair please," Percy practically demands. Of a goddess.

Sometimes I think he's suicidal.

Freya is scarily silent for a second.

Two seconds...

Three...

She breaks into peals of laughter. "Oh, I like you, Perseus Jackson. You've got... mmm, what's that word you mortals like to use? Spunk! You have spunk."

I blink, surprised that Percy isn't a dust mote. "Yes, Lady Freya. But what he is saying is very true. We need some of your hair."

"Yes, yes. I'd like a favor done, though."

Percy grits his teeth. "Shocker," he mumbles, "absolutely shocking."

I give him a look. "What's the favor, Lady Freya?"

"Oh, nothing much," she trills. "It's just, Aphrodite has this amazing beauty cream, and she promised to share, but she hasn't yet, so could you go get some of that for me?"

Percy groans. "Aphrodite. Of course it was Aphrodite. It can't be someone like Hestia, or even Apollo for gods' sakes. It has to be the goddess who wants to make my love life 'interesting.'" He isn't even trying not to be heard anymore, but I don't think Freya cares.

I bow my head. "Yes, Lady Freya. We will complete this task for you in exchange for a hair-"

"We swear on the River Styx," declares Percy triumphantly. Somewhere behind me, Magnus chokes. "Now it's your turn."

Freya's eyes dart away. "Oh! Well, I-"

"Swear it," Percy says, with a voice like poisoned honey. The air around Freya seems to become heavier.

"I also swear on the River Styx." Thunder rumbles. Freya's eyes flare open even wider. She didn't want to say that. She was threatened.

"Lovely," simpers Percy, his voice sickly sweet. "Well, we'll be off then. See you soon!" He turns on his heel and strides out of the room. 

Question for you guys. I'm planning my next book, but it won't come for a while. What do you want to see?

Percy Jackson/Harry Potter crossover

or

Percy has a different godly parent AU (if this one, please tell me which god.)

Thanks,

ATOTALMUSICALNERD