Until The End of Time | Wonho [√]

21: REDAMANCY

REDAMANCY: THE ACT OF LOVING IN RETURN

Wonho disappeared for five days after that.

Which meant, 120 hours, 7200 minutes, and 432000 seconds.

Time had never been so relevant to me. Most of these hours, and minutes, and seconds I spent pondering over my brash and abrupt confession to Wonho, and wondering if that was what drove him away. Was that too sudden? Was I being whimsical? Did he think of me as an easy and brazen person?

I knew that only couldn't be the reason for him to keep his phone off for five days, almost a week. When I tried to call him I was directed straight towards the voicemail section, no matter what time of the day it was.

So I let him be. When I asked Changkyun if he knew of Wonho's wherabouts, he simply said he'd come around, that he was maybe resting. When I inquired Hyungwon, he quirked an eyebrow and thought for a while. There wasn't anything from his past experience that he could think of.

Wonho's graduation from the university was oncoming, and he probably needn't be in the campus, he probably had to study a lot, or think about his furure from here on.

His silence was like an obstrusive shadow of a humongous cloud looming over me from right above. It didn't seem to faze anyone else, but it stayed attached to my shoulders and head.

I couldn't shrug it away. No matter how much I indulged myself in the university lectures, and club activities, and the part time job, and occasionally flipping throuh the pages of the books I sometimes borrowed from the library, I couldn't set my mind anywhere properly.

Wonho resided in a big portion of my mind, even though he was absent in reality.

A text came just before I was starting to feel really unsettled.

The short text from Wonho arrived when I was in one of the university auditoriums, attending a boring, and lengthy seminer on contemporary writing relating it to pre modern writing, just because I didn't know what to do when fully alone with my thoughts.

I didn't want to spend time with Changkyun and Hanbyul either as I didn't want them to ask me again what I was thinking about, and I didn't want to explain them why.

A breath of relief surged through the pit of my stomach when I read his text, asking me if I was at the campus right then, and if I was free to talk. It took me right back to not so long ago, when I had kissed on Wonho's cheek, and I didn't see him for the next three days.

Unlike then, I couldn't feel so happy after him coming back. I was just relieved. I skipped to the backdoor and stepped out of the dark auditorium as the elderly lecturer started presenting a few slides on the whiteboard.

Outside, the afternoon sun was casting a golden light on the fields and on the student's heads passing by. I took a quick ten minutes walk to the central library, where I had decided to meet Wonho.