I fidgeted nervously with my jacket, Jisung put his hand on top on mine.
"Chill alright? We got this," I nodded, the stress was still there.
-
I took a deep breath and stepped up onto the stage.
"Hey guys~" I bowed. "My name is Y/N, I've come here to introduce myself. I'm the soulmate and girlfriend of one of these members," I gestured to the members behind me.
"She's my soulmate," I felt Jisung walk up behind me, pulling me into a hug.
Suddenly the fans started shouting. It ranged from 'why her?' To 'she's so pretty!'
I wasn't used to this. I took a step back, Jisung took my hand.
"Hey it's ok," I pressed my back into his chest. I closed my eyes.
It's been a long time since I had a panic attack, I could feel the tears threatening to spill. I felt my heart rate increase. The last time this had happened was right before I moved to Korea, when I was talking to my parents. They had been mad at me that I would also move away, they had no children left there. I was forcing them to be alone. I'd thought they wouldn't care, Wendy was always their favorite anyway. I was the one who didn't have potential.
I tried desperately to regain control of my mind, I was shaking now. I could feel myself getting lightheaded. Somehow I had chills and was freezing when at the same time hot flashes made me feel like I was burning.
I had a vague feeling of being on the ground, someone was talking to me. I opened my eyes and saw the members crowded around me. I looked at Jisung, sitting right in front of me.
"too many people," I whispered.
The members looked confused but Ten, Mark, Johnny Jaehyun, and a few others. I realized I must have not noticed and spoken in english, my native language.
"Too many people," I repeated in Korean. They understood and backed away a bit, but Jisung stayed. I looked up at him.
"are you okay?" He asked, I nodded.
"Sorry," He shook his head.
"There's no need. What happened," He helped me up.
"panic attack, sorry the last one that happened was a while ago," He nodded and pulled me into a hug.
"I'm glad you're okay," I hugged him back.
"Thank you," Jisung didn't respond, simply putting his head on top of mine.
"Jisung?" I said.
"yeah?" He rubbed my back.
"I love you," He pulled away a bit.
"You mean that?" I nodded.
"I love you too," He smiled.
A/N
Sorry if I messed up the panic attack symptoms a bit. I've never had one. My closest personal experience is an anxiety attack.
Thanks!
-author
