Hounds of War [Yandere Generals x Female General Reader]

45. A Truth That Can Not Be Spoken.

Y/N Hurried through the midnight campsite, the frost crunching under her bare feet as she ran. The sight of her breath in the air made it clear that winter was not far away. Even though she only wore a slightly transparent white tunic she was numb to the cold, I'm not weak being the sole thought on her mind.

Even though it had been years the lash scars burned on her back just as they had the day she had received them. I'm not weak I'm not weak I'm not weak, she chanted to herself.

Arriving at the large field on the edge of the camp that was used for combat training she pulled out one of the training dummies and began to hack at it with her sword, not bothering to catch her breath from her run.

"Gyah!" She growled as she drove the sword straight into the dummy's chest. I have to get stronger I have to get stronger I have to get stronger, she thought as she continued her attack. I'll show father that I'm strong, stronger than my sister, strong enough to live!

She continued to slash and cut at the dummy, but it became increasingly challenging as her eyes clouded over and began to burn, No matter how much I must sacrifice and how many people I have to cut down, I WILL PROVE MY STRENGTH-

"I was wondering if I'd find you here," A calm voice spoke behind her, startling the normally alert general.

"What are you doing here Eslinn?!" Y/N snapped as she whirled around, pointing the sword at him on instinct. "You should know better than to come upon me when I'm training."

"I couldn't sleep so I decided to go for a walk and get some cold air in my lungs," He said, taking a deep breath as he pretended not to notice that Y/N was wearing nothing but a thin tunic. "Then I heard the sound of someone training and figured that the only warrior dedicated enough to train in the middle of the night was you."

"I'll do whatever I have to do to get stronger, you know that," Y/N said. "Now either stop distracting me from training or fight me!!" She growled, pointing her blade at his throat.

"You're upset about something," Eslinn replied bluntly, not faced by the gleaming metal weapon as he gazed down at Y/N with a small smile. "When we were at the temple you would always sneak out in the middle of the night to train when you were upset."

"I don't know what you're talking about!" Y/N growled, blinking furiously to try and clear the tears from her eyes without letting them slide down her face. "I don't get upset, I am the descendant of a war god!"

"So why are you upset?" The brunette repeated as though he hadn't heard a word that she had said, his voice surprisingly caring for a warlord.

"Do you..." Y/N began, her voice faltering as she lowered her sword, looking at the ground. "... Do you think I'm weak?" She finally managed to ask as she looked up at Eslinn, her E/C eyes shining with tears.

"You are one of the most accomplished pupils to have studied in the temple of Estain," He told her truthfully. "everyone at home-"

"I don't care about what they think," She interrupted him sternly. "I want to know if you think I'm weak."

"No, I don't," He began, pausing as he tried to find the right words to say. "I think that you are one of the strongest warriors I have ever known, maybe even stronger than the previous General Denlleonis, but I bet it's that strength that causes you to be so upset now."

"What do you mean?" She tilted her head in confusion, trying to understand what her old friend and comrade was saying.

He was quiet for a moment, trying to find the right words. Comforting others had never been a strong suit of his, but seeing Y/N upset made him want to try. "You are so used to being able to do everything yourself, so used to always knowing what to do, and always having the power to do what needed to be done that on the rare occasion that you feel fear you are unsure how to handle it. But I want you to know that I am here for you whenever you feel unsure of yourself."

Y/N had to choke back a sob and found herself unable to speak. For as long as she could remember, she had been told that as the heir to an Esedict General that she too had to be strong, that she too had to know no fear, that she too had to become the likeness of a war god. She had never been allowed to admit it when she felt weak, and no one had ever told her that they wanted to be there for her when she was scared.

Slowly, with tentative steps, she walked towards the hulking warrior. She let her sword drop from her hand as she reached him. With equal hesitance, Eslinn opened arms to her. Not waiting another moment she flung herself into his arms and began to sob.

Eslinn wrapped his arms around her as rubbed her back awkwardly, completely unsure what he should do to comfort her. If Y/N hadn't been so upset she would have felt very awkward about the whole thing as well.

After several minutes of sobbing quietly against Eslinn's chest, Y/N finally started to feel the cold and began to shiver. Eslinn noticed her shaking at once and pulled away enough to unhook the clasps at the fur collar of his blue cape.

"Here, take my cloak," he said as he pulled it from his broad shoulders and wrapped it snuggly around Y/N.  "You'll get sick if you stay out here like that. Let me protect you the way that you have protected others-"

"-Eslinn stop," Y/N said sharply as she pulled away from Eslinn's reach and turned her back to him. "Don't say it."

"Why not?" He asked, his blue eyes mixed with both curiosity and sadness as he approached her.

"You know that if we are honest and name what we make or may not feel towards each other we will be committing one of the highest acts of treason possible," General Denlleonis reminded him as she turned back to face him. "As long as it remains unspoken we are guiltless."

Her face was again stony, but there was a crack of sadness in her marble facade as she turned away, pulling Eslinn's cape tightly around herself and she called "Goodnight, Esedict General Azeeion."

A/N

I hope you all are enjoying where this story is going. I know that there has been very little about the actual war, but don't worry that's going to change soon.

Until next time I'll see you on the other side

~J. C. Coltt.~