Feel My Soul Avenger

Being Loved

WARNINGS:    Swearing, Mentions of Past Abuse towards OC

   Tony  Starks P.O.V

          "Love you."

          "Love you."

          "Love you." 

           Those two words kept running around in my head as I held Stella as close to me as I  possibly could as she slept. Her deep and even breathing would occasionally hitch as her subconscious mind took over and tried to drag her into the realm of nightmares. Something that I was, sadly, more than familiar with. It didn't take her long to once again begin to tense up in fear and unease in my hold. It was only my promise to her and her words to me, that had me holding my anger in check at what had happened to her today. So as I promised her I would, I did my best to chase away the nightmares and memories that were trying to take a hold of her precious mind. 

        Now you may be thinking, Tony Stark comforting somebody? Yeah right! Well, you wouldn't be wrong. I've never had to comfort anyone before, let alone have someone rely so heavily on me to keep them safe while they slept. Without any other ideas, and absolutely no experience calming anyone down, I took a page out of my mothers book and decided to do what my mom used to do with me when I was sick as a boy. What she used to do, was make a gentle shushing noise and run her fingers through my hair, even if it didn't make me feel better, it would at least calm me down enough to sleep. So I figured, what harm could it do to make a quiet shushing noise and give her hip a gentle squeeze, while my other hand carded through Stella's hair gently. It was an extremely awkward hold, but I'd stay in that position for the rest of my life if it meant bringing her comfort and a feeling of safety. Thankfully, and to my great relief, she snuggled down deeper into my hold and made a contented sounding little sigh. How she managed to get closer to me, I've got no clue, after all, we were as close as we could be at this point. Honestly, I just hoped she would settle down into a dreamless sleep, she had been through enough today. 

         I was glad to hold her, and my erratic breathing which had been fluctuating since I saw her bruised and bleeding in that bastards arms earlier began to finally abate and turn into even harmonious breaths. I had never stayed with the women I had slept with overnight, so I had never really experienced the feeling of holding someone close, so as we cuddled up close, I lost myself in the sensation of having her SAFE in my arms. Her words continued to bounce around in my head. One of the downsides of being a genius, my mind never shut up.

          "Love you." 

           I don't know if she had said it knowingly to me before she had fallen asleep, or if it was her subconscious mind that had her speaking those words to me after a long and stressful day. But she had said them. She had said the words my soul had longed to hear for years, and like pouring ammonium phosphate onto a chemical fire my soul was soothed. I could feel it in my heart and in every fiber of my being that my Angel had meant every single word. 

         FUCK! She actually loved me.

          ME! 

        A recovering alcoholic who still drank way to much at times. A man who had known he had a soulmate, but who had loved enjoying the pleasures of woman in the past either way. Not only that, but even I knew that I had had one too many one night stands filled with only half the pleasure I knew my soulmate could give me. I had issues. Like how I'd forgot to sleep most of the time, so in turn the coffee I drank most likely ran through my damn veins.  I know I was probably the hardest man in the world to love, and still, in the week that I had known her, I had longed to hear those words fall from her perfect, pink, pouty lips. Only to hear them tonight when I least expected it.

         She loved me! 

        Love. It was a concept I had heard of and was familiar with. I had loved my mom and I had loved my father, though admittedly not as much as my mom since he was always pushing me so hard and criticizing my every move. But this kind of love, the love of a woman's heart, was entirely new to me. . . This angel that had seemingly come from the heavens. She must have fallen out of the sky right into my arms, only to be placed here to save me from myself. Hell, I knew I loved her. I fell for her the moment I laid my eyes upon her deliciously curvy figure. Her tender brown eyes drew me in while her smile lay claim to my heart and soul in just a few short seconds. Granted upon meeting my angel I knew I was instantly ready to declare my love for her then and there, but for probably the only time in my life to date, I thought of someone else first. How would she react to my sudden declaration of undying love? 

        Hell, I was surprised by the feelings flooding through my body and giving me a high better than any drug. Plus deep in my soul, I knew she would be surprised. Besides now definitely wasn't the time to overwhelm her with my thoughts or feelings. Considering the day that she had had, I wasn't shocked at her nightmares, though I was shocked that she had called for me to comfort her. She didn't call for Clint. She didn't call for Steve. She called for me, and all in all, I  could never deny my angel anything. All she ever had to do was ask and I would gladly lay the world at her feet. 

        So I would lay here by her side all night, making sure that I chased all of the dark thoughts and dreams away from her, even if it meant I didn't sleep that night. It wouldn't be the first time I had ignored my bodies needs and it most certainly wouldn't be the last, especially if it was for my Angel. 

        A/N: I reread this story the other day, and read all of your comments as I went through, and it helped me FINALLY finish this chapter. So thank you to everyone who has commented and voted for my story and added it to your reading lists. You guys are literally the muses that inspire me!!!!