LIFE'S LESSONS

The Next Day

Anna came home the next day around noon . She looked refreshed . The girls ran to greet her .

Anna : Hi girls ! I missed you ! How were you guys last night ?

Kara : Good , daddy made us pizza and we had garlic bread .
Kaia : We had salad and milk , then we watched a movie and he put us to bed .
Ben : Don't forget the bath  . You had a bath too .
Anna : Sounds like you had a good night .

Anna : Let me get you guys some lunch . Just give me a minute to change and put my bag away .

Kara : We'll help you mommy !
Anna : I'd like that my sweet girls .
Anna lifted them up and was walking up the stairs with one on each arm , and Ben carried the carry on upstairs .
Anna : Thank you . ( she took the carry on , and stood in front of the door .)
She let the girls down , shooed them in and shut the bedroom door .

She changed and let the girls jump on the bed . They seemed happy . She was grateful , she hoped this situation would not affect the girls too badly . She was not naive enough to think that it wouldn't , but she knew that this could not go on . She thought she'd have to get them therapy . She wondered how much that would cost .She could not be with him , she did not trust him at all and though she did not hate him , she resented him deeply for what he had done to her . She wished desperately they she could be completely indifferent towards him . She felt rejuvenated . Being with Julian , she felt good about herself after months and months of beating herself up . The constant thinking that she was less than because  her husband had started sleeping with another woman , that he loved another woman , that he was willing to destroy her to be with that other woman. He had utterly destroyed her self esteem , even though she pretended to ignore him his presence and absence did hurt her . On second thought she did hate Ben . What kind of a person does that ? No , she was not going to give him one more second of her life . She was going to be finished in a few months . Then she would get a job and file for divorce . It didn't matter if she would be alone for the rest of her life , she couldn't live like this . She knew Kenney would help her not get screwed in a divorce . She didn't want anything she didn't deserve , but she was not going to let him abuse her further .

Ben sighed . She would be up there for awhile now with the girls and then she would sit them down at the counter and the girls would chatter on and on about anything and everything . Anna was always cheerful around the girls , but if you looked closely her smile rarely reached her eyes anymore . She had become withdrawn and sullen over the last months . She did look better this morning , more relaxed , she looked stunning before she left last night . He knew he was responsible for her change . He was scared of her graduating , he didn't know what she would do when she finished . She never talked to him anymore . Only about the girls . She never demanded anything from him anymore . The only thing she demanded was the vasectomy . So he knew that she had accepted the fact that he was sleeping with Tonya . Otherwise , why force the issue ? He's not sure if he should tell Tonya or not , but he had not because he never had any intention of leaving Anna or the girls and he would never start another family with Tonya . He could barely handle a mistress , but another family ? So what was the point of discussing something that would never happen ? He knew that after some more time passed she would take him back . She grew up without her father , and she was a teenager when he had died . She would never do that to Kara and Kaia . He was just going to be the best husband to her when he was around . He had to convince her that his love for her had not changed , people in other countries had two wives . Why couldn't she understand that Tonya had nothing to do with her or the girls ?

Anna came down and led the girls into the kitchen .
She put them at the counter and took out some chicken .
Anna : You guys want chicken salad ?
Kaia : Yes !
Kara : I'm ok with that .
Anna : Ok .
Ben : Don't I get a vote ? ( he had just walked in )
Anna ( politely ) : What would you like ?
Ben : Chicken salad is good .
Anna : Alright .

Ben got out the Mayo and the celery and the bread .
Kara : Look mommy , daddy is helping !
Kaia : Yes he's helping !
Anna : Yes everyone should always try to be helpful , right girls ?
Kara : Right ?

Kaia : What are we going to do for our birthday mommy ? Daddy ?

Anna was dreading the birthday it was coming up in two weeks . Sara and her mother would help her . They had missed the deadline for preschool because Anna had not known that she would be returning to school , so the girls only had a few friends . Jack and the little kids in the neighborhood , there were only 3 . So only 4 little kids , Kenney , Sara and her mom .

Kara : Can we do it at the zoo ? Like Jack ?
Anna : We can think about it . Let me think and we'll decide ok .

They had lunch , watched some Netflix . Anna was going to get the girls ready for bed but Ben offered to do it instead . Anna agreed and headed to the guest room for the night . Her mom would be there in the morning before she left for school . She was just about to climb into bed when she got a text .

It was Julian . Her heart skipped when she saw it .
Julian : Did you get home ok ?
Anna : Yes , by the time I got home it was almost noon .
Julian : Alexi had me up at 9 am!
Anna : Lol !
Julian : Are you busy ?
Anna : No , the girls are upstairs with their father getting ready for bed , and I'm downstairs in the guest room . So there is utter calm ! Lol .
Julian : Can I call you ?
Anna : Sure .

Julian : I still think it's easier to talk on the phone vs texting if you have time you know ?
Anna : Yeah you're right .
They started talking and before they knew it an hour had passed . Julian did ask why she was in the guest room . She reluctantly told him . She told him about her mom and how she stayed during the week . She told him about her confusion about the girls bday . And she unknowingly invited Alexi to the party , if he'd like to attend a 4 yr olds party . Julian said he'd ask Alexi , he told her that he was shy but an overall happy child . She told him no pressure it was up to Alexi , but that Jack would be there too .

Ben stood outside the guest room door . He could overhear her talking to someone and laughing , they were discussing someone named Lexi . She was probably talking to Sara . He knocked .

Anna : Yes . ( she still had the phone in her hand )
Ben : Can we talk ?
Anna : In a few minutes , I'll meet you in the living room .
Ben left .

Julian : Gotta go ?
Anna : Yeah , thanks for calling ! Or texting or whatever . Thx for calling me . ( she whispered )

Julian : I intend to make it a habit .
Anna : I hope you do .
Julian : Goodnight Anna . Sleep tight .
Anna : Goodnight Julian .

She sounded so vulnerable Julian thought . The husband really did a number on her . He knew it would take a super effort on her part to trust again .

Ben was waiting in the living room for her . She had gone upstairs to say goodnight and tuck the girls in .

Ben : Are they asleep .
Anna : Yes .
Ben : I wanted to talk .
Anna : What is it ?
Ben : I want you to know that I love you . Nothing has changed . Tonya has nothing to do with you or the girls , she has not diminished my love or commitment to you or the girls .
Anna : I can't believe this . You're really too much .
Ben : I'm telling you the truth .
Anna : You wouldn't know the truth if it slapped you in the face . You cheated on me and the girls.  You've destroyed my trust in you . You thought you impregnated your whore and that's why you confessed . You continue to break your marriage vows , you have told me that you are in love with your whore and that you are not going to leave her . You have completely shattered my self esteem and my self worth . I can truly say that I hate you . The only reason I did not end myself was because of the girls . That is the truth Ben . That is the truth !

Ben looked shaken .
Ben : You really thought about killing yourself ?

Anna : I wanted to everyday , but I didn't because of the girls . I really hate you . Why don't you just leave ?
I don't understand why you just don't go to her ? Why are you even here ? Are you planning on abusing me some more ? Because that is what you have done . You have abused me , with the constant lying and cheating and sleeping around .

Ben was crying .
Anna : Stop it ! Fucking stop it ! I'm the one who should be crying not you ! Always the manipulator .

She went into the guest room and shut the door .