Chapter 34

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Jesse quickly walked over to us, his eyes firm on his eldest son. Everyone who sat down at the funeral was now dismissed, saying their last goodbyes to my mother. I looked over at the coffin, I had already said goodbye, saying it again would just be too hard.

We all briskly walked out of the church, my head sulking with tears traveling down my face. I quickly wiped away the salty water droplets, I hated when strangers saw me cry. Hell, I hated when these boys saw me cry.

My heart hammered inside of my chest due to all the nerves. If this was their dad he was bound to be apart of my life now somehow.

I hate feeling so weak, feeling so wary of each man that walks into my life. Never knowing whether or not they'll end up like Zach, or if they'll end up like Luke. I just wish there was some way to know if someone was good or bad. And I wished I could get rid of this constant worry, all I wanted was to be normal.

We all stood in front of the church, waiting for their dad to walk out and give us some sort of explanation. I had never met him before, and I couldn't ever recall my mom talking about him.

I raked my fingers through my hair nervously, distracting myself each time my mind drifted towards my mother. It still hurt too much to think about.

A tall man quickly walked out of the building, uniform still on and stubble on his chin. His eyes raked over the crowd, looking for our group. His eyes landed on Blake, before smiling slightly and walking over to us.

He pulled each of them into a hug, as each gasped at the sight of him.

Guess he didn't get to come home too often.

Luke next grabbed onto his father, pulling him into a strong hug and patting him on the back. "What — what are you doing here?" Luke gaped, his eyebrows scrunched in confusion and shock.

I looked up to the man, grabbing onto my arm tightly, awaiting his answer. "Well — like I said, Laurel was a good friend of mine in high school. I had been gone for so long, I thought now would've been a good time to come back. But. . . apparently I didn't come back with very good news." He sighed, biting the inside of his lip, lost in thought.

I frowned, blinking away the tears yet again, for what seemed to be the 500th time today. If mom would've kept her steady lifestyle, I probably could have met Jesse and his sons sooner. It wouldn't have to be under such terrible circumstances, and we could've had a different bond.

Maybe some things just aren't meant to be, though.

Jesse turned to me, making me slightly shrink in fear. "I'm really sorry Quinn. . . I can't even imagine how you're feeling right now. Especially at such a young age, how old are you by the way?" He gave his condolences, making me slightly feel  more at ease with him and his calm exterior.

"15," I informed him quietly, making all the boys turn to me in confusion. "I thought you were 14?" Ryder asks, squinting his eyes slightly. I shrug, twisting my foot int the grass while staring at a flower in front of me. "Today's my birthday." I sigh, as they all gasp.

"Why wouldn't you tell us?!" Andrew exclaims, throwing his hands up to his hair and pulling on it in frustration. I shrug again, never understand the point of birthdays anyway. It's really just one year closer to death, no normal person would even want to celebrate that?

"A party just didn't seem fitting with everything going on right now. . . and I knew you'd suggest one." I close my eyes, trying to remember my last birthday party.

I couldn't though, and that only made me more upset. Mom would never get to sing happy birthday to me again. Her angelic voice would soon be wiped away from my memory, feeling more like a fever dream instead of reality. Which was worse? Never being able to hear her voice again, or forgetting what it sounded like?

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⏰ Last updated: Mar 05, 2021 ⏰

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