A Court of Dreams and Vengeance {Azriel x reader}

Chapter Seven~ Missing

Edited

Azriel's POV~

Starfall was magnificent, as always. The finery of the males and females on the dance floor shimmered in the faelights hovering above. There was soft, twinkling music flittering around from the musicians in the far corner. The area itself was open to the night sky and halved for the dancefloor and tables. Each decoration was carefully handpicked by the owner and perfectly represented what Starfall was to the people of Valeris. 

Feyre, Rhysand, Mor, and I winnowed here while Cassian was to pick up Y/N. The ladies held because their dresses prevented them to fly. Amren was in an elegant, flowy grey dress, a formal version of her everyday clothes. Mor, Cauldron save me, wore her signature color. Blood red. The golden embroidery on the form-fitting gown accented the ringlets in her hair and the dress itself hugged her curves and flowed out at her thighs. 

Feyre wore a gown of shimmering greys and silver, the colors a complete opposite of her mate's, yet they had matched. We stayed close in a group, waiting for Cassian to fly Y/N here. It was all but five minutes until we saw them nearing us, Cassian's wings flapping in the wind. Their faces were serious until he had shifted her weight. With the movement, Y/N had hissed in pain. Her face contorted as she tensed up. Cassian's eyes shot to hers and they seemed to be having a serious conversation. I had to fight against the urge to send a shadow to listen in, but it was private based on the shield of darkness that covered them when my brother stopped mid-air. 

Rhysand looked to them, confusion crossing his features. "The hell are they doing?" He asked, causing the others to look. 

"That's odd," Mor added and Feyre agreed. 

When the shield dropped, Y/N was paler than this morning. But when they landed, she walked away from him and bid us a small greeting. I noticed a muscle feather in my brother's jaw as he watched her walk to the drink table. She'd been distant lately, no longer laughing when she came back from sparring with Cassian. And when she decided to move across the Sidra I knew something was wrong. It killed me to not know, to not be trusted enough for her to come to me. But I did this to myself, so all I could do was bear it. 

It was hard on Cassian too, when she moved. One night, when we were both intoxicated, I dared to ask what she meant to him. He just said it felt nice to have a fresh face and another Illyrian to befriend. But there was something in his eyes that said otherwise. 

I looked around, spotting my friends on opposite sides of the party. Cassian flirting with a green-skinned faerie, My High Lord and Lady were dancing in each other's arms, and Mor was dancing with three other males. The sight of it boiled something in my blood. Watching her grind and tease them. 

"She's mine!" I almost roared, the sentence slamming into me harder than it should have. She isn't mine. Never was and never will be. This is just complicating everything in my life. Falling in love with that woman, made me miserable. I realized that I was never happy with the situation I put myself in. After centuries of fooling myself, of watching her take lovers and losing my pain in my own, I noticed how miserably unhappy I am. The only time I was ever feeling anything remotely positive, was when I was with Y/N. Maybe it's time to move on. 

I look to her, needing to see her. She was indeed at the drink table, but something was off with her. Once I made eye contact with her, the wild look in her eyes echoed through my bones with the overwhelming feeling of being crushed. The bond. It clicked in place and I could feel what she felt. Thoughts rammed themselves into my mind. Screaming down the bond. 

"You'll never be good enough."

"Just a useless female."

I should have never left.