𝐈𝐍𝐅𝐄𝐑𝐍𝐎 ᵀᵂᴰ¹

22. 𝙈𝘼𝙎𝙏𝙀𝙍𝙋𝙇𝘼𝙉

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘-𝐓𝐖𝐎 || 𝘔𝘈𝘚𝘛𝘌𝘙𝘗𝘓𝘈𝘕
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[ ɪꜰ ɪ ᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴡᴇʀᴇ ᴛᴏ ʟᴏꜱᴇ ʏᴏᴜ
ɪ'ᴅ ꜱᴜʀᴇʟʏ ʟᴏꜱᴇ ᴍʏꜱᴇʟꜰ
ᴇᴠᴇʀʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ɪ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ꜰᴏᴜɴᴅ ᴅᴇᴀʀ
ɪ'ᴠᴇ ɴᴏᴛ ꜰᴏᴜɴᴅ ʙʏ ᴍʏꜱᴇʟꜰ ]

    A WHILE LATER Roland had patched his shoulder up and was sat against his bag. Matt had wandered off to god knows where. He didn't care that much since his mind was completely in a different place than now. All he could think about was Emily and what could be happening to her with him not being around. God, he hated himself so much for not bringing her in with him. There was no way he could escape the guilt and sorrow if he was too late. She had filled that hole in his heart that made him feel as human as ever. He cared more about her than himself, and if she was to die because of him, he wouldn't be able to live with himself.

But just by the thought of it made Roland's chest tighten. He hated that this was his fault and not just some stupid coincidence. This was the world punishing him for not being more careful and not letting the girl do what she wished. Maybe if he did then this all wouldn't have happened and they could still be on the road, together. But everything was coming back and pinning itself back on Roland because he didn't feel comfortable with Emily using a gun after the first incident.

This was the reason why he was scared of getting close to people. Because one second he could have them in his grasp and be feeling glad to have them around. Then the next, they were ripped away from him and he was left with nothing but himself. That hole in his heart beginning to appear once more and leaving him back at square one.

Matt had reappeared and walked over to him, taking a seat beside him against the wall. Bringing his knees up and propping his arms on them. "Thinking about her?" He asked and Roland licked his lips before giving a stiff nod. Leaving the question at that with no verbal response. But Matt was just fine with that. He knew what the man was going through and didn't blame him for the way he was acting towards him.

"You probably asked yourself why I want the people with Emily dead, right?" He asked and Roland looked at him. It indeed had crossed Roland's mind, but he knew better than to ask people about their business. Unless it included him and was something he needed to know, he would pay it no mind. But this was something that included and concerned him. If he wanted to trust Matt, he needed to know his motivation and understand it.

Roland nodded slightly. "Yeah, it's crossed my mind." He replied as Matt turned his head and leaned it against the concrete wall. "Their leader, Mandy Greyson, killed my friend." Roland immediately felt the sadness wash over him as he listened to Matt's every word. "The bitch made me watch them fucking beat her and cut her up," Matt said with his voice slightly wavering.