Red Winter [Bucky Barnes]

Chapter Sixteen: Shut Up and Kiss Me

I was half tempted to pinch myself, because this certainly wasn't happening to me. This had to have been a dream, there was no way that this was real, it couldn't be. I must have died again, because the feeling of his lips against mine was heavenly, hell it was downright sinful. I had imagined how it would feel so many times before but nothing could have prepared me for this. 

God why hadn't we done this sooner? 

Words couldn't describe how intoxicating he tasted or how beautifully the soft callouses on his fingertips grazed against my skin. I'd never felt anything like this before and I silently cursed myself for not being bold enough to make the first move. But I could tell he'd wanted this too, his hands gripped my waist tightly, like he was scared I was going to slip through his fingers. 

His lips hungrily claim mine, his touch desperate, like he was making up for lost time. I knew how long I had wanted this to happen, but I wondered what his turning point was. What had I done that caused the almighty Winter Solider to grow weak? He'd certainly wanted this for a while, I could tell with everything breath and lingering touch that he was starved. 

I wrap my arms around his neck, pulling him closer to me, a soft moan escaping my lips as his leather brushes against my bare skin. He smirks arrogantly against my lips as he wraps his arm around my waist, and I in return run my fingers through his hair, pulling tightly enough to make him groan. He bites down teasingly on my bottom lip and I feel my legs go weak, and I nearly crumble to the floor. 

"Not so strong now are we," he whispers against my lips as he runs his fingers up and down my spine, his other arm still wrapped tightly against my waist. His lips move from mine to my neck as he grips my hips, pulling me as close to him as he could. I close my eyes as I melt into his touch, savoring every moment with him. 

I didn't know if it was just him or the serum, but every touch was heightened and magnified. I could feel every graze of his skin and his breath dancing gently across my skin. It was true and utter perfection, and I could have died right here and now, perfectly content with going out feeling as good as I did now. How could I ever go about my life again, knowing that I couldn't spend every moment like this? 

"God I love you," I moan as he runs his hands up through my hair, tugging ever so lightly. He and I both freeze at the magnitude of my words, and my heart plummets to my stomach as I realize what I had just done. He slowly pulls away from me as he looks me directly in the eye, his face veiled in an unreadable emotion. 

I had fucking ruined it. 

"What did you say," he asks, his voice low and still. His face remained unreadable, and I tried to look into his eyes hoping to find something to work with, but there was nothing for me to work with. I could usually read a person easily, but in this moment I was completely blind. 

I feel my face go pale as look down at the floor, unable to look him in the eye anymore, suddenly feeling incredibly exposed. "It was nothing, it just slipped out," I mutter quietly, feeling my cheeks burn with embarrassment. How could I have been so stupid to have said that? He must think that I was insane, hell, I would have if I were in his shoes. 

He gently tilts my chin up so that I was looking him in the eyes, which had now softened with a familiar emotion. "I love you too," he smiles before pulling me back into his arms, his lips claiming mine again, this time more tender and affectionately. My heart swells in my chest and I can't help but smile against his lips. 

So I was right, all of those longing gazes and subtle touches weren't just in my mind. I'm sure that I had the stupidest smile on my face, but I didn't care. James Buchanan Barnes loved me and in that moment that was all that mattered.