𝐎𝐇 𝐎𝐏𝐇𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐀 ; lord tewkesbury

XVIII.

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"Yeah, I've heard the news." I gulped, unsure of how she wanted me to feel.

On the inside I was truly excited for her, Lilia always deserved better than what she was given.

I tapped my fingers against the table nervously, this meeting already felt disconsolate, comprised of our shaky breaths and uncomfortable glances.

Light rested on her face, making it appear even more delicate than it already was. Although seeing her now, she seemed less creased with stress compared to when we were younger.

It was a surprising sight to see, as she's always been the uptight kind. Delicate and soft, yet at the same time hard, Lilia was a complicated creature that's for certain.

Complicated was probably her worst attribute, but her beauty made up for it. You'd have to be crazy not to see it. See how she held herself, see how gentlemen turned their heads as she passed by, how young girls looked at her in awe. She seemed to grow more beautiful by the day, just as her mother would always claim.

Sounds of restless voices filled my ears, each body as tired as the next but they made sure nobody could see this, so they wore their finest of silk to cover it up.

Lilia looked the brightest one in there, and that was saying something, but it filled me with relief to know she was the one I was speaking to.

I began to daydream, Lilia's voice faded from my ears. I should be listening, paying attention, but for some reason being back at home I couldn't focus for too long. There were other things drawing my attention.

"I'm quite happy about it. My days have been much more fulfilling without him. He wasn't worth much anyways, father says I still have a chance to marry. At least I didn't ruin it entirely." She smiled shyly, taking a sip of her tea.

I studied her face for a moment, the flush of her cheeks as she smiled to herself. The way her eyes were like winter, the small lines that framed them. You look so much older, like a real adult, I wanted to tell her but I bit my tongue.

I wondered if I appeared older any, or if I still looked like the troubled child I once was.

It seemed as if the youthfulness of her face was slowly fading, blending in with her surroundings. Aunt Brookings said that you only could hold your beauty for so long, but you had to keep it until you could at least find a husband.

Once you have children the bounce of your cheeks would become hollow, your eyes would fade of its color and hold circles that shadowed them.

This already happened to Lara, a girl we had gone to school with. She married soon after school ended, within months followed by a swollen belly. Once the child arrived she was never the same, almost as though it dimmed her. She walked tiredly through the streets, the child wearily at her hip.

Lilia hadn't married Theodore, but she would marry soon and we all knew it. I wondered how long it would take for her to turn into Lara.

Lilia's soft blonde hair was now propped up on the top of her head, pushed back to reveal the true beauty of her face. Lilia used to wear it down, let it fly freely in the wind, now it felt restricted and tightened where it laid.

My own hair was still loose, hanging to my shoulders. I felt an urge to pin it up as well, but I held myself back. I liked the way my hair looked already and I wasn't in a rush to
change it.

"Well, if you're happy then I'm happy for you Lilia." I nodded reassuringly.

"Have you seen him yet?" She shifted in her seat uncomfortably.