Between Us

Chapter 1: Harsh whispers

The sun was scorching on the day Zola Nontanda came back from school to find her parents screaming at each other. It was something she should have been used to by now.

She didn't even have to enter the premises to know her mother was around - her mother who was never home nowadays. So instead of heading inside the air-conditioned household, she sat on the chairless porch, already feeling the blisters forming on her skin. Neighbours who passed by gave her a pitiful look because they knew the happenings of her family full well. There was never an escape from nosy neighbours. She hated the looks of pity she received almost as much as she hated the fact that as she sat there, her family was amidst splitting up. Unfortunately, she could do nothing about either situation.

She couldn't change her parent's minds and make them fall in love with each other again. She couldn't stop her mother from moving away. She couldn't stop her father from selling their home. She couldn't even stop her neighbours from maintaining their 'inquisitive lifestyle'.

After about half an hour of pretending the grass on her lawn was the best thing since moving pictures, she got up and knocked twice. Immediately, the raccus ceased and harsh whispers took its place. She slowly opened the door and let herself in, not wanting to wait for a response. In the living room stood her parents, her father was the first to address her.

"Bhelekazi, how are you, when did you get back from school?" A frantic Daluxolo asked his daughter. Curiosity laced with worry was present in his brown eyes.
Actually, he wanted to know whether or not she had heard that they were arguing. The answer was she had, time and time again bore witness to the implosion of her parent's marriage. At this point, there was no way to avert the ignition. 

"I'm alright Ta, I just got here." She answered dishonestly to her father as he embraced her. Her mother, Sivuyile Tyaliti saw right through her act but kept quiet. Zola was always transparent when it came to her mother. She didn't like how she always failed to hide anything from her.

"I... uh... should go take a shower..." she mumbled, releasing her sweaty self from her father's clutch.

"Of course, of course, we'll just finish up here." Her mother replied motioning to the countless number of boxes that littered every available space in both the living room and kitchen of the open-plan house. A house that was her home for over ten years.

"Would you mind if we went out for a late lunch when you're done?" Sivuyile asked, rubbing one side of her arm like she always did when she got nervous. Zola thought about it for a bit before she agreed. Her own mother was afraid to ask her to lunch. When did things take such a dramatic turn?

"Not at all." Those simple words brought ease to her mother's already aching heart. Zola hastily ran up the carpeted stairs to her bedroom. She shut the brightly decorated door behind her and leaned against it for a good moment. She slid off her blue bag from her shoulders and her black school shoes from her feet and began the laborious process of taking her school uniform off.

The shower water hit her back like a thousand acupuncture needles, relieving her of the stress that was her collapsing family, at this point nothing could hold them together.

When she went downstairs her parents were still putting away old memories and in a way, laying them to rest. Seeing them in two separate corners looking at anywhere as long as it isn't each other served as just another reminder that they were unquestionably separating. She still could not fathom that the same people who seemed so in love with each other just a few months ago could be the same people she saw before her. The thought made her heart constrict.

"Usugqibile?" Asked her father upon seeing her.

"Ewe, I'm done. Where are we having this lunch?" She inquired.

Sivuyile was quick to answer, "How about that restaurant at city central, the one close to the pharmacy."

Zola did nothing to hide the look of shock on her face. Her mother forgot the name of their favourite restaurant, the same restaurant they have been going to for as long as she could remember, when they were still a family. Was it forgetfulness or was she purposely trying not to remember to make leaving easier for herself? That possibility seemed much worse.

"What restaurant Ma?" She probed, hoping that it was just the stress of moving away to another country that made her lose details of the memories of all their wonderful times as a family. She hasn't even left for crying out loud! Plus it wasn't all bad. Things only turned sour recently.

Daluxolo tried to chime in but was quickly cut off by his daughter, the hurt visible in her eyes, Sivuyile's sudden 'forgetfulness' was the last straw for Zola. She had been doing a splendidly terrific job at suppressing her feelings towards the separation but now she was at her breaking point. Was she overreacting? It's possible. But at that moment she didn't care.

"Mama? What restaurant?" She tried once again.

"You know..." Sivuyile said, "The Grill, we've been going there for forever, why would you assume I forgot that?" She looked hurt...

What was the end game here? Why was she playing the victim right now? Everything that was happening was her fault and she had not come to terms with that. She had not come to terms with the fact that she was selfishly breaking her family apart. The drastic realization that her mother did not love her felt like her sinews were tearing. It was easy to come to your own conclusions when you didn't know the full story, especially when what you knew hurt you.

"Well, you're making it look pretty easy to forget about us and move to Canada!" She snarled, every word laced with venom.

"Zoleka! Calm down and apologize to your mother!" Her father piped up in defence of his ex-wife.

"I can't believe you tata, you're defending her?" Zola asked her father, tears stinging her eyelids.

"She is your mother!" He argued, but Zola was just getting started.

"She stopped being my mother a while ago! If she was still interested in being my mom she would not have failed to make it to my first performance! Where was she then huh?" She turned to her mother. "Where were you?"

That performance was supposed to be the highlight of her school life. It was her first time performing solo on the school stage and she had been telling her parents about it for months. When her mother failed to pitch, it broke her heart. To this day she doesn't even know why her mother never showed.

"Your mother is not to blame for that." Daluxolo retaliated, right hand reaching to scratch his stubble like he always did when he was nervous. What could he be nervous about at this moment? That Zola would blow up at her mother and tell her to piss off because that is exactly what she was about to do.

"Stop making excuses for her! I'm sick of it. You're always taking her side even when she's wrong. You're always telling me 'No sana lwam, akulo phutha luka mamakho.' I'm sick of it."

She turned towards her mother and spat, "Leave Sivuyile."

Daluxolo gasped and was in the middle of biting Zola's ears off when the woman of the hour intercepted.

"It's alright," she announced, lightly touching Daluxolo's arm, "I'll leave."

And with that, she prepared to leave. She clutched her custom made handbag that she had received as a gift from her then-husband, but when she tried to kiss her daughter's forehead like she always did before departing Zola simply moved away from her. She might not have noticed, having been so engrossed in her anger towards her mother but the action broke Sivuyile's heart all over again, tears started to swell in her eyes and her throat hurt from trying to hold it in. And with that, she quietly shut the door and left.