My Killer

Promised Prison

Promise?

... ... ...

... ...

...

Yes, I promise...

... ... ...

... ...

I could hardly remember packing up our stuff, nor rappelling down that steep wall. I had just been going through the motions, drowning on the inside to such an extent that I could barely take note of what was actually happening all around me.

Yes, I promise...

It was a wonder in itself that I had been able to follow Michael's clear-cut directions on how to get down from the plateau. But I did. I made my way down that treacherous wall and proceeded to unhook myself from the hanging rope that was binding me to this place, that was binding me to this mind-numbing experience, and yet at the same time, that was not actually binding me to him. No, what bound me to Michael was somehow a lot more substantial than a mere rope, it bound me in a way that not even a set of chains could ever do. I could feel the weight of it, ever-growing, ever-changing, so real despite the unseen nature of it all. I could feel it in my mind, in my soul, in the pit of my stomach. Something so unreal that it felt almost tangible in a way, like I could just reach my hand out and touch it. Only, I couldn't. But it was still there, a promise, a promise accompanied by so much more...

Tell me, do you trust me, Sophie?

...it was right fucking there. I just couldn't escape it. It was still fucking right there. His promise, and this emotion. I just couldn't shake it, none of it.

Just... do it... run...

Don't...

Fucking move already... one foot... just start with one foot...

No... don't... don't...

Move...

I... I can't...

Yes, you can...

I... I...

Tell me, do you trust me, Sophie?

I... I... I shouldn't...

Promise?

Yes, I promise...

Just fucking move already...

Just go... before... before...

But...

... ... .

I was facing the forest, frozen in place with my back to the wall I had just descended when I heard Michael's feet hit the ground behind me with a soft thud. I had been frozen for what had somehow become an eternity of warring thoughts, warring thoughts that were forced into submission by the reality of my situation, forced into submission by Michael's sudden close proximity. And just like that an eternity shattered to pieces and became a single instant, a single instant which narrowed down several choices into one sole choice due to my inability to act. I had inadvertently made a choice by taking too long, by taking too much time to reach a decision. I had made a choice by not daring to make a choice.

Fuck...

I had been facing the forest, my mind caught somewhere between the urge to make a run for it and with the fear of doing just that, a fear which had intermingled with a wicked promise gifted to me by a monster. I became caught by these treacherous emotions which somehow made me feel the need to stay. My mind had screamed for me to get the fuck out of there before Michael had a chance to come after me and at the same time I had been unable to put such driven thoughts into actual actions. I just couldn't do it, and before I knew it, the choice itself had expired. Michael's presence at my back had robbed me of the chance to make any foolish mistakes. Because deep down I knew it to be just that, a mistake, a folly. Who had I even been trying to kid? I couldn't outrun him in my current condition. I hadn't been able to outrun him earlier, had I? And that's when I had believed in truth that I had had an advantage, it was when I had even had an actual head-start on him, the meager illusion of a chance. Only, it had been a mirage, a castle of airs, a mistake. My body was still suffering the consequences from that one mistake, it made me hesitate to make another rash decision. And Michael's promise, his promise made me weak just as much as it lent me this seemingly undiscovered reserve of strength.