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Suji~
"I don't want to be with you," Taehyun stated. "I put you behind me. You're already in the past."
I can't feel anything.
All my hidden emotions, the only remaining hope that I had, everything I was working for... it all vanished in that exact moment.
"I'm so sorry," I mumbled once again. "I'm really sorry..."
"I don't need these anymore. Just throw them away." He didn't take the box and left me there, alone in the dark hallway.
My life is now meaningless, now that I've lost the only last person I was living for.
My mom already passed away a few months ago, but I never told him or anyone about that. Her death was very sudden and it's been quite harsh for me- it even made me become selfish... I thought I found comfort in being alone, but that's completely false. It was just a coping mechanism.
I took the box and threw it away, as he demanded me too. I'm done caring about other people... it's the reason why I'm in so much pain right now.
I tried to walk, but my legs are starting to give up and I'm not sure how much longer I can stand on my own two feet.
I fell in the middle of the road and cried my heart out.
During that moment earlier, I felt like trash. Like I was being thrown away to be forgotten, just like Taehyun's belongings and the memories associated with them.
It hurts so much. My heart feels like it's being stabbed over and over again.
I struggled to stand back up and walk a little further, but I held myself up until I was standing in the middle of the main road. I spread my arms out and closed my eyes, the sound of honks being faint to my ears since all I could hear are my tears.
I just want to get run over right now.
I want to get hurt or die so badly.
Maybe then he'll come back and take care of me. Like he does for her.
___________________________
Taehyun~
Once we finally arrived to the hospital, she was immediately taken to the emergency room. The staff there already knew Dabin, so they've already set up some protocols. She must be a regular here.
"Are you her guardian? Can you please sign this? She hasn't been attending her sessions lately, so her body relapsed. It's just so she can be admitted for the week." One of the nurses handed me a form, and I signed it without even reading since they're all rushing me.
"What's going on? What sessions..." I muttered. "Is it serious?"
"I'm guessing you haven't had the talk yet," she deeply sighed. "Chemotherapy. Dabin unfortunately has stage two leukaemia. Seeing her condition right now, it's definitely getting worst."
The rest of the time without me by her side, I spent overthinking about why this had to be the situation. Why hasn't she told me something this important?
I know our relationship isn't too deep in yet, but knowing what's happening makes me want to devote my life to her. To make her happy, so she can have the will to attend her chemotherapy and live.
She's a really special person to me. Dabin is now a part of my life, and she's the only other person who could somewhat heal me. I want to be there for her too. I need to be, because who else would?
At this point, I don't want her to be a replacement. I want her to be my future. It doesn't matter to me if I don't love her right now, because I can always learn to. This is not an act of pity, but to show her that she has somebody.
Once the doctors finally transmitted her into a room, I was then able to visit and sit near her bedside.
All the wires connected to her, the beeping sounds... it must be hard.
My pain is nothing compared to hers.
___________________________
Tomorrow's my graduation aaa I'm so old huhu cries:')
