Influence

Chapter 18

It paid to be careful. Not that a cautious approach meant everything would always go according to plan. Jasper coming home right when Shay was placing the care package on his porch, for instance. She hadn't expected that—it wasn't in the plan she'd worked up earlier that day, and yet, she was proud of how she'd handled the situation. In fact, even though he'd seen her and talked to her, one could argue interacting with him delivered a far superior outcome than merely coming and going undetected.

Her identity was still safe—that was crucial. No matter how he may have seen himself, Jasper DeAngelis wasn't the most observant person, which was why she'd brought him his care package. Some people needed a little nudge. She'd achieved her goal without being identified, and that was because she'd been careful with her words, and because she'd had the wherewithal to park her car three blocks from Jasper's house.

She walked away from him with an extra bounce in her step, their conversation fresh in her mind. She wasn't even bothered by his rudeness. Jasper had woken to a new reality today. He could be excused his callousness. After an adjustment period, he'd see through that new lens Shay was cultivating for him. She'd allow him grace and time.

Sunlight stung the back of her neck as she headed east. Several people glanced her way, their faces momentarily frozen as they deciphered what they were seeing.

Goldie! ...No, not Goldie. Can't be.

They averted their eyes and moved on as if that moment of false recognition made them slightly embarrassed. But then, this was LA. Non-celebs were mistaken for celebs all the time, mainly by tourists who expected to see A-listers in their baseball hats and sunglasses on any given street corner. People saw what they desired to see.

Right now, everyone wanted to see Goldie. Shay was happy to be that manifestation of people's desires if it brought them comfort, even if it was fleeting. A dearth of idyllic beauty had been left in Goldie's wake. At some point it would need to be filled, but for now, Shay wanted only to help Jasper redirect his grief. Or anger, rather. The man acted like the world had wronged him when really it was only one person. His anger would find its due so long as she nudged him in the right direction.

Her roommate still at work, Shay arrived to an empty apartment. So much the better. She didn't need Deirdre's judgement. Not when she was both mourning and plotting. Best to do both these things in solitude.

Shay had her own box. Her own self-care package. Her idol was dead, so she could be forgiven for indulging herself. She slid the box out from under her bed and placed it on her side table. This box didn't have the fancy bow like the one she'd given Jasper. It was plain, unadorned cardboard. Still, it was the very box her first Goldie Finch merch had been delivered in almost seven years ago. A t-shirt with Goldie's face on it and a poster of Goldie with her then six month old puppy, Bailey Boo. The poster still hung on the wall opposite her bed.

Over the years, she'd placed different mementos in this box. The lid of a coffee cup Goldie had thrown away outside of her favorite cafe, the faintest trace of pink lipstick still visible. Shay smiled, remembering how Goldie sometimes wore non-metallic lipstick when she wanted to go incognito. Also in her box: her ticket to the convention last year and her blue lanyard VIP pass. Shay had gotten to meet Goldie at that event, but she'd played it cool, like she was a random Goldie Girl instead of GoldieGirl01, the indisputable leader of the stans. Goldie must have figured out who she was, though. She probably watched Shay's fan videos in secret. Maybe she even followed Shay with an anonymous account. That seemed likely. Goldie had been so warm and personable with her, but she had to keep it cool as well, not giving any overt recognition away. No one needed to know they had a special bond.

Then there were her new additions, images she'd printed out, some from her phone's camera roll, others from her online detective work. These were amongst the carefully selected items she'd given to Jasper so he'd realize who was to blame for all of this.

She shuffled through the items, placing them back in the box.

Her phone chimed. Another text from a blocked number. Same as this morning's cryptic and disturbing communication.

Tighten the noose.

The fuck was with this asshole? She tossed her phone onto the bed without responding. What the hell did they suppose she'd been doing all day? It didn't matter if they assumed Shay had spent her time lighting candles and incense in front of her Goldie Finch shrine. The outcome would be the same and this craziness would end the way Shay wanted it to.

She shuffled through the items in her box until she came to the last one, also a new addition. An iPhone. It's case still sparkled with golden rhinestones as if nothing bad had ever happened to it, but its screen was badly cracked, webbing like a drunk spider lived under its surface. Even if she couldn't see clearly, the phone itself might still work if she were to turn it on. She wouldn't do that though. It paid to be careful and turning on the iPhone would be a careless mistake. It would mean curiosity was more important than cautiousness. Shay had to set boundaries for herself, especially after yesterday.

She returned everything to her box and slid it back under the bed, then turned her attention to her own phone.

Don't worry, she texted to the anonymous asshole. She'll have the chair kicked out from under her soon enough.

______

Gah! What is Shay doing with that iPhone?!! And what is she hoping to get out of Jasper?

Side note: This story was hands down the most difficult one I've ever written. In part, that's because during the pandemic, especially the early days, it was especially difficult to focus and muster up creative energy. But beyond that, the story's content took me well out of my comfort zone... but thankfully, I enjoyed that challenge!