Hazel Levesque || ANGST

Memories bring back you

Basic info: set after ToA, first part is a letter from Hazel to Sammy
Tw/Cw: -

Dear Sammy,

I'm sorry. I'm sorry I disappeared. I'm sorry I didn't say goodbye, I'm sorry I didn't argue with you more about you taking that ruby. I should have wrestled it off you - thing is, I knew that just by touching it you'd get cursed. I guess I thought that the worst was already over, that the curse would increase. But I was wrong, and for that I'm truly sorry. Christ, life was tough, wasn't it? I'm sorry for leaving you to live it alone. You didn't deserve that - you deserved so much better.

You'll be happy to know that I'm getting a proper education now. Yeah, the times have changed since we parted. People of colour can get a good education, we can sit down on buses and even use the same bathrooms as white people!! The racism still hasn't disappeared though, and I'm beginning to doubt it will. Recently there has been so much violence against poc, but the good thing is that there are people fighting back now. Hopefully it's not all in vain, and that the deaths spark a flame big enough to make change. Funny story, I was travelling with my friends Annabeth and Percy the other day, and for the longest time I stood outside the restaurant we got lunch in. They didn't even realise I'd stopped - I don't think they expected me too. Soon enough though, Annabeth came back out and I had to explain that I thought I wouldn't be allowed in to eat! That's how I first started realising all the changes. We celebrated by catching a bus - which I sat down on, and Percy stood so I could - to the Martin Luther King memorial!!

You probably knew all this happened though, I'm just realising. But all I could think about at the time was just how much I wished I could tell you, and then Reyna (my girlfriend - I'll elaborate soon, I promise!) suggested I write you this letter. I know you can't read it... I know that you're probably down there in Asphodel, your very being drained out of you, with no recollection of who you are, who I am, what the world was like. Pluto below, you probably wouldn't even remember what I had to be sorry for! Nico mentioned that that meant I didn't have to always feel guilty, that I had nothing to apologise for and that I really did nothing wrong. But I know he's just saying that to make me feel better.

So, more on Reyna... she's amazing, Sam. I love it when she speaks Spanish, when she smiles her eyes light up, and every day I'm so grateful to have her. I wish you could have met her. I wish she could have met you. I'd known I was bisexual since we met that girl on the streets, remember that day? We were running from the coppers down at the docks, and the girl - I think her name was Dorothy - took us into her little shack and gave us some coffee? It was really bitter, but I drank it anyways. Just so she'd like me. I see a lot of Dorothy in Reyna, like the way Reyna steps up and takes charge and no one doubts that she is in control, she is so powerful and strong. But there are also the smaller things that make Reyna Reyna that I love so much.

I've also met your grandson, Leo. He's a lot like you, you know. The first time I saw him, I thought you'd escaped Asphodel too. But then he introduced himself as Leo, and I was gutted. Today though, he's no longer just your grandson, a painful reminder. He's Leo Valdez, Bad Boy Supreme. You did well, old chap. I'm glad you found someone to settle down with. Leo is an idiot - but he's our idiot. Mine and the rest of the seven's. Don't worry about him, okay? He's got the world on his side.

I miss you, Valdez. I miss your cocky smile and your annoying nicknames, I miss you swinging through my old rotten door and saying, 'hey, Witch Girl! Come escape your Ma for a bit, I got something to show you' and then take me to an old alleyway where there is absolutely nothing to see except us two. I miss the mischief we got up to, the feeling of being up on the stable roof when it was forbidden. I used to think of that night all the time, the little cake and the kiss on the cheek that was absolutely scandalous yet also amazing at the same time. But those times are past, Sammy. I have to move on.

You were my best friend, my rock, for the longest time. I cannot thank you enough for letting me get to know you. It's been an honour, Valdez.

With love,

Witch Girl.

~~~

Hazel signed off the note, tears dripping down her face. Nico squeezed her hand. "Take it down to your father, see how he reacts. I can't promise anything, but he should at least try to see you." He said, firmly.
Hazel gulped. "Nico, Pluto isn't like Hades. Pluto didn't even care when the woman he supposedly loved and her daughter gave up their lives, no matter how shitty they were, to save the world. He didn't- he didn't step in when I went to Asphodel with Ma. He doesn't care, not like Hades cares about you."
"It's worth a try, sweetheart." Reyna's voice came from the other side of the room. "Go see Pluto. Nico and I will be here when you come back."

So Hazel did. She wasn't at all surprised when Pluto refused an audience with her, but something inside of her still broke. The piece of paper crumpled in her hand, and she dropped it into one of the many fires that burned endlessly in the underworld. She watched as it shrivelled up and burned, finally moving on from her past, and shadow traveled back into the warm arms of her girlfriend and brother. The past was over. The present was now. And the future was yet to come.