Lady Sarah's Secret

XXVII. China, if you ask

"Do not be worried, Sarah," Amelia was saying as she interlocked their arms, "It is only Caroline, Mama and Mrs. Owens going with us."

Sarah let out a sigh and gave a backwards glance to the morning room where she'd taken tea with her new in-laws that morning. Lady Eleanor had planned a trip to town in order to supplement Sarah's wardrobe, which was understandable. Poor Amelia had been clothing Sarah for a week, and Lady Eleanor was insistent that the new Lady Amesbury be measured by the dressmaker in town. A heavy pit of dread had dropped into Sarah's stomach the moment the morning's venture was made known, she was nervous to interact with the guests, with Caroline and Eleanor and especially terrified of what Charles would say today. Things had been left such a mess last evening - their wedding night- that announcing a trip to go and spend more of his money did not seem like the safe thing to do.

"Won't Charles want to know that we're going shopping?" Sarah asked, trying not to cling onto Amelia for the lifeline she was.

The two had been close in girlhood, and despite their time apart, that friendship had begun again with ease. Sarah had always thought of Amelia as the closest thing she had to a sister, and Amelia was comforted by Sarah's genuine friendship amidst the debutantes she'd been competing with and the was grateful for the familiarity she found in Sarah that could not be found in Charles or Henry of late.

"It was his idea," Amelia looked at her curiously, "Didn't he tell you?"

"No, he-"

"Sarah," She spun to find Charles behind them, a somber look on his face. Sarah felt nervous all of the sudden, and involuntarily gripped Amelia's arm a little tighter.

"Give us a minute, Amelia?" he all but ordered his sister out of the corridor. Amelia only smiled, gave Sarah's shoulder a pat and proceeded down the stairs to meet the others in the Front Hall.

"Good morning, Char-"

"I asked my mother to take you in town today," he explained in a voice that was nearly void of emotion as he continued closing the gap between them with each step. Sarah felt stuck to the spot.

"Lady Sarah cannot be seen wearing a housemaid's uniform," he said it curtly, and Sarah did not laugh, "I've sent men with you for the journey," he paused just in front of her now, "You should be very safe," he finished quietly, and Sarah watched his eyes roam her face. Biting at her lower lip she scrambled for something to say, for everything to be better between them again.

"Thank you," she squeaked out, trying to find a glimmer of the man she'd glimpsed behind this mask. He took another step towards her, closing the gap of what was strictly proper between a man and woman who were not married, but they were married, Sarah reminded herself as Charles reached up to touch her face. She had to tip her head back to see him, and she found what she'd hoped for - just a glimmer of care in his eyes as his thumbs ran in tracks up against either side of her jaw.

"You will be careful, will you not, Lady Amesbury?" he asked, in that same gruff and unfeeling tone he'd adopted once again. But the way his fingers held her face up to his, Sarah felt like crying, but she only managed a nod. A moment passed as they stared at one another.

"I've given my mother specific instructions as to what you will need," he explained, dropping his hands from her face, "I advise you not argue with her," he added.

"Charles -" she began, wanting to mend what she'd broken, wishing to reach out to him again, longed to be his friend once more. But when she could not get the words out, he surprised her by taking her the lapels of her coat and pulling her even closer to himself.

"You need a new coat," he was saying so gruffly and softly, but Sarah was so distracted by the feeling of his chest rising and falling under her hands that she hardly minded his words, "Sarah," he added in a gentler tone as he tugged at her lapels first one direction and then the other, buttoning her into her coat as if she were a child.