I watched you choose him instead of me

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''Delia?'' Myrtle whispers as she approaches Cordelia's office and after she can hear soft cries and whimpering, she walks inside only to find Delia sitting on a chair crying and wiping the tears away from her chin and cheeks. ''Oh'' Myrtle says before coming closer and kneeling down in front of her. ''Is she gone?'' Cordelia asks and looks up at Myrtle and her nodding breaks Cordelia over and over again. ''Why did you let her go child?'' Myrtle asks not realising that she is making things worse right now. ''I had no choice okay?'' Cordelia screams which causes Myrtle to jump a little because she isn't used to Cordelia showing emotions like these. ''I had to let her go because me and Hank are trying to have a baby'' she says and Myrtle can tell Cordelia is trying to convince herself it was the right choice letting you go but deep down both of them know it wasn't and as much as Cordelia tries to hide her feelings it's no use. ''Is there anything I can do?'' Myrtle asks but Cordelia shakes her head and simply asks to be left alone and so she does and exits her office. 

As Cordelia sits there crying it's like a movie is playing in her head with all of the memories you two have shared together. She remembers meeting you for the first time and Myrtle bringing you into the academy. She was a smiling and blushing mess and kept playing with her hair, a nervous habit of hers. The two of you got along well because you were just a few years younger and the two of you spent a beautiful summer together with many special memories and Cordelia taught you a lot. Then the younger witches joined and things became a bit crazy with Fiona but even in those last few weeks and months you were always right there by her side, hugging her, comforting her. You would always defend her no matter if it was in front of Madison who got pissed off because she wasn't allowed to go partying or if it was Fiona being horrible to Cordelia. You were always right there, defending her and you would have taken anything, Madison or Fiona's mean words, even physical pain to be there for her and show her support when Cordelia lost her meaning. Thinking of all these things makes her think about Hank and that he has never done those things, she doubts her decision but quickly composes herself and she pushes the doubts and thoughts away realizing she has no choice.

The next few weeks were hard for Cordelia because she tried to hide her true feelings she has for you and she is constantly fighting a battle of reaching out to you or not. One part of herself tells her there is still hope and you couldn't have gotten far yet but the other part tells her it's too late and she needs to settle with Hank and just accept her fate. She had no idea yet that her life would soon turn upside down and everything would happen in a completely different way than she imagined. The pain of losing you was very strong and a lot of the times in between classes or after Hank was there she would cry silently in her office and pretend to be strong whenever she was around anyone else. The weeks ahead with her mother dying, a new supreme rising, fighting witch hunters and her being temporary blind, despite her not knowing that yet, could still not get close to the pain she is currently feeling after losing you and you walking out of the academy. 

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It has just been the weekend and as you stand in the shower you sigh a bit because ever since being younger you hate monday mornings. They remind you of endings, every beautiful and fun weekend coming to an end and work and real life beginning again. You have always hated Monday mornings especially while being a student at university and the academy. These days you try and not think of those times too much but it's small situations, flashbacks and things that remind you of the coven and the people inside. As the cold water runs over your skin, goosebumps rise and you think of the dream you had last night before waking up earlier. It was you in the coven and it was just simple you going to your classes but something felt different in the dream because you didn't know anyone there and all the people who used to live and learn there were gone. After leaving the academy you often had these dreams about Cordelia, the coven, Myrtle, your friends and sometimes nightmares about something happening and them getting attacked and you wanted to reach out after every dream but you reminded yourself that that chapter is no longer part of your life and you need to move on. As you open your eyes you notice you have been in the shower for way too long so you quickly turn the water off and get out the shower. When you see the time you hurry up getting dressed and ready for the day because your student Coco would arrive anytime soon now. Teaching her was both a curse and a blessing at the same time because at first she hated the lessons but the more you encouraged her and the more you read into that kind of magic, the more confident she became and she is actually doing really well and probably one of the most promising witches you have taught so far. After she arrives you ask her how she is doing and she tells you that her side career as an Instagram influencer is going really well. You chuckle at her sense of humor and the both of you get started on your lesson for today. After the past few weeks of teaching her you have focussed on her magic to detect gluten and calories and you figured maybe you can also teach her how to detect and sense danger so you are currently working on that. While you two are working on magic she carries on talking about her Instagram and dream career of being an influencer and you let her because it helps her concentrate on the spells and magic. ''Yeah so basically I gained one thousand followers in a week and I don't want to toot my own horn, but it's pretty incredible'' she explains and you can't help but chuckle at her word choice. ''That's awesome Coco'' you answer and the both of you carry on trying everyday dangers like if she is in the kitchen with a blindfold and you cause some kind of danger like a little fire with magic if she can sense it and although it's not perfect yet she manages fine. 

Cordelia Goode x Reader- InsteadWhere stories live. Discover now