why do I love you?

day 2

Iwaizumi's p.o.v

I get a call from the coach asking if Oikawas okay. he told me what he did and I rushed to his house. he wouldn't answer the first few knocks so I used my key he gave me. I walk in and a shadow is running around me not so quietly. "Oi, shittykawa what are you doing." "Stop calling me that." he snaps. "Okay, crappykawa the fuck are you doing." "Thats no better either." he says irritated. "How is it not better?!" I ask determined to find out what he's thinking. "well it doesn't make me feel any better." he spat. I turned on a light and he was sitting on a coach with tear stained eyes. his arms are trembling. I see a drip of blood on his finger. "What happened to your arm?" I ask. "None of your buisness." He said uninterested. "It is turoo." he rolled his eyes and layed down. "I thought it was crappykawa." he said dismissively. "You just said it bothers you." "So noow you care about my feelings." He says like he was a genius. "I always have." an icy glare was sent my way. "Just stop." he says like he's holding back from punching me. "STOP WHAT?" I ask yellin gout of frusteration now still trying to see under his sleeve to see why he is bleeding. I am no where close to seeing what it is. "stop pretending you care! it just gives me more hope that you do." he says with tears leaving his eyes. my heartbeat increases as I watch his tears stream down his face. "Please leave." he asks. I sigh and turn around. his eyes don't fallow me so I close the door and go to the kitchen trying to make him some food. I found a bloody knife on the kitchen counter. I was furious. I run up to him and grab his arm shove open the sleeve. I can't see the arm anymore because the blood is covering it. "How long have you been this sad?" I demanded answers while crying. "Since always." he said flatly. "why didn't you say anything?!" I'm yelling at him. "When was I suppost to speak up?! when you were saying how pathetic, crappy, horrible, over dramatic, or when i'm USELESS?!" that last word was said with more hurt than any other words.

"I was joking!" "It wasn't funny! it hurt! did you know I wake up at four in the morning just to look pretty everyday. just for you?! Working on my body for you! it's never enough is it?!" I'm speachless. he was always hot. and his body was fabulous I would always try my hardest not to look at him when he would change or when he was wearing that adorable outfit yesterday. "leave." he says coldly. "No. i'll stay by you." I say trying to sound as calm as possible. "I don't want you." he says clearly giving up. it hurt me so much when he said those four words. "I don't care, i'm staying. don't want you right now. leave!" he says. "NO!" I shout. I felt a sting on my cheek as soon as I said that. "LEAVE" he says growling. it's not the slap that hurts me. it's the tears on his face, his smile he faked, his sad feelings were all because of me. I never wanted to hurt him but by trying to save myself I did. "Okay. I'll leave. but once your ready to talk i'll come over and talk." "Wait one second. how did you know to come?" he asks pissed. "Coach called saying you almost got hit by a car. came as fast as I can. bandage those cuts before they get infected." "I wish I did get hit." I hear him whisper.