[: mcyt angst :] - DISCONTINUED -

chapter 17: going, going, gone (part 2)

i don't want to bore you, so i'll just put the trigger warning and get on with it :]

< T W > mentions of an0rex!a, arguing, yelling, very close contact between two boys (IT'S NOT SHIPPING I PROMISE, THAT'S GROSS🤢), low self-esteem, mentions of self-hate, intrusive thoughts

~ { Tubbo's POV } ~

A harsh light blinded me. I raised my hand to cover my face. A loud gasp scared me, and I looked over to the noise. Tommy was sitting in an armchair. I furrowed my eyebrows and looked around the room, only to find out that I was laying in Tommy's bed.

A tall glass of water stood next to an apple and a small bowl of yogurt with strawberries on top. A small ice cube floated gently in the water, like a duck in a pond. I sighed and put my head back down on the soft pillow.

"C'mon, Tubbo, get up," Tommy stood up and grabbed my shoulder, lightly lifting me up. I swatted his hand away and looked at him.

"Get away from me," I spat. Tommy rolled his eyes and picked me up again with a stronger grip that I wasn't able to wiggle out of.

"Now, eat." I drifted my focus onto the small portion of food waiting patiently on the wooden desk. A small yellow lamp dimly lit up the room, along with a light on the ceiling. "I'm not hungry." I crossed my arms and looked away. Tommy didn't give up.

"How so?" He questioned. "I... ate already." "Tubbo, your mother said you never ate dinner, you skipped breakfast, and you never got a chance to eat any of your lunch. When did you eat?" Tommy asked. I scowled and laid back down, this time facing away from Tommy with no intent of getting up, much less eating.

"I asked you, when was the last time you ate something?" Tommy asked again. I ignored him. "Stop ignoring me, I'm trying to help." "Help?" I laughed dryly. "Help? Really, Tommy? Forcing a question out of me and then stuffing food in my mouth? How are you helping me?"

"I'm trying to understand how you feel and then I'm going to give you some food. Yes, I'm helping you," Tommy grunted while pulling me up. He fought until I was sitting up at the edge of the bed. "I'll ask again, when was the last time you ate?"

I looked up and looked right into Tommy's blue eyes. "I don't know."

That made Tommy freak out. "What do you mean, you don't know? How do you not know?" he pressed his palms against his forehead and stared bewildered at me. I shrugged and looked at the cream carpet, only glancing at the food. It made me cringe to think about eating calories. I internally gagged.

"Because my memory is terrible, Tommy. You, of all people, should know that." "Oh, and you didn't eat lunch yesterday. You said you ate a big breakfast, but it had been a few hours, so you should've been fine. What's your problem, Big T?"

Tommy and I were furious. My face was red and hot, and Tommy seemed like he was just babbling whatever he thought of in the spur of the moment. I wanted to just say no and leave, but he was being extra persistent.

"Are you saying I have a problem? What's your problem, Tommy?"

"I don't have a problem! You do!"

"No, I don't! I'm fine!"

"Oh, stop with the 'I'm fine' bullshit! That's not gonna work anymore!"

"Tommy, I'm really fine! In fact, I was great before you started asking me questions."

"I'm doing this for your own safety!"

"Since when does it matter that I'm safe?"

"Since FOREVER, Tubbo!"