under the magnolia

i could have

you have this smile

it's small, quiet 

and it's heartbreaking 

it's enough for wars to be fought for it 

it's ok when you grin

wide and uncaring

teeth bared to the heavens 

but don't you dare give that 

small

oh, so sad 

smile 

telling me that i could have 

if i had tried 

don't give me that smile 

as if to say 

that you were alright

because i know you're not 

don't lie

i rather you spit at my feet,

scream until you're hoarse,

head tilted towards the sky, blinking back tears 

not this painful, careless smile

a tilt of a head

and a little brush of fingers 

and there you go

reminding me of what 

i could have done