The adventures of Poop

How it all began

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Bowl barely managed to waddle into the damp , dark cave before stopping abruptly, causing himself to wobble. Toot glided out of bowl, a trial of watery poop behind him. He then sat on top of a comfortable gigantic rock. It was probably a few decades old as it was damp, warm and soft, like a thick layer of melted cheese of sausage-baked rice.

"Alas!" cried Toot, "I have lost a tenth of my body. slowly, gradually, each step I take , a small amount of me shall be left behind... until I shall no longer exist. This is the fate of crappy creatures. All I desire to do in my remaining life is to just toot the legendary hoot.......just once. Only then shall my muddied soul rest peacefully in the oceanic wastes

"Say... tell me more about the legendary hoot and the evil toilet bowl queen," toot commanded as he began licking his scattered privates in hopes of regaining his body.

Bowl stared blankly at the urine storm,eyes (not really) glazed and sighed...........

Long time ago, in the land of humans, the most posh, expensive and valuable toilet ever was created. Its was made out of pure gold , embroided with many precious stones , handcrafted by the most skilled toilet maker in all the lands.

It was a gift for their Great King, Bob. He loved his dear toilet bowl very much and named her Ssteutink. For years she served her King, enjoying the way his smooth, baby soft sitting cushions would carress her like an octupus stroking a rambutan.    

Until one day after 5 consecutive days of diarrhoea, she had enough. She had enough of him dumping that stuff into her mouth, she hated porridge. She was tired of being suppressed and underestimated, as tempting as being sat on by the most glorious butt sounded.

She wanted to be in control, and she would be the one to oversee everything.

When king Bob sat onto Ssteautink the very next day for his next pooing session, Ssteautink flushed him down the toilet and consumed him. Taking his remaining poop(she made sure it was solid, hard and good quality) she made it into the hoot of wrath, as a reminder to all creatures of what would happen lest they used her the wrong way(she REALLY hated porridge).

She then fleed with her fellow lover, a dirty rusty toilet bowl used by the king's servants.

"..........and that was how it all began," said bowl as he crunched on a opal gemstone, letting out an ammonia-rich burp as she devoured it.

"oh...uh..okay...." toot muttered," where'd you get that by the way?"

"Behind that pile of jetpacks and ponchos." "Ah."

Toot wasn't too sure about how he felt about tooting a toot made out of poop.

It was a little twisted.

Just a little.

"What's your name by the way?"

"Bowl," was the curt reply.

"Didn't see that one coming."

It was silent for a while, except or the soft pitter patter of the now gentler rain.

"Bink," mumbled bowl , "I'm called Bink."