Portrait of a Swallow

Schijtgeel

There was something strange that shifted in the unexpected normalcy in Seri's life. Her stay at Gu Seung Joon's was pleasant, filled with quiet mornings of fair company, the tea they shared over their morning porridge bringing a sense of calm to her day. But after a certain number of weeks, Seri found something peculiar in Gu Seung Joon's mannerisms, how his stare would linger on her longer than she deemed appropriate, how he would brush his fingertips along her hand to thank her for a meal, how he would smile his best smile in hopes of her lips would curl into mirroring gesture.

She didn't know how to act, for he knew that her heart belonged to another. Perhaps it was in her head, these strange gestures, but then Seung Joon started working more frequently at home, signaling Seri that there was, indeed, something else he desired.

One night while sharing a meal together, Gu Seung Joon inquired about the reticent painter.

"Seri-ssi, can you tell me more about this Master Ri?"

Seri hadn't discussed the depth of her feelings toward Jeong Hyeok to anyone else, for she held her love for him like the glow of an ever present lighthouse, its brightness guiding her to safety no matter where she was.

"What would you like to know Gu Seung Joon-ssi?" She questioned back, unsure of how much she should divulge to him.

"Well, it seems he wasn't just a mere employer to you, Seri-ssi," Seung Joon ponders "because not many, if any, maids would go to such lengths to protect their superiors."

Seri winces at the word 'superior,' for even if it were the case, she had grown accustomed to viewing Jeong Hyeok as her partner. She wondered in that moment where he was, where his mind and heart had drifted to, and if he had found another muse to paint. But the fervency of his words never failed to convince her of his intentions, so she was quick to dispel any inkling of hesitation she may have of his vows to her.

"Seung Joon-ssi, you are right, Master Ri wasn't merely a superior, but if you haven't forgotten, I was threatened by Cho Choel Gang and my story, as well as the story of previous maids, have urged me to come speak to you," Seri says with a strength that surprises even her.

Seung Joon, realizes the error of his words is quick to apologize "No of course Seri-ssi, I'm not insinuating anything inappropriate of course, I just was inquiring the nature of your relationship with Master Ri."

"And why are you so curious, if I may ask?" Seri quips a little too defensively.

"Because I would like to provide for you Seri-ssi, more than merely an employer," Seung Joon says without missing a beat, and then murmurs a "perhaps as your husband," as if it were an afterthought.

The admission shocks her, though Seri can't say that she hadn't felt his feelings towards her changing. Nevertheless, she couldn't bear to give her heart to him, when the man she yearned for was all alone, all because of her own doing.

"I cannot," Seri denies vehemently. "I cannot Gu Seung Joon, when I am not willing to give my soul to another."

"I can protect you from Cho Choel Gang, Seri-ssi, we may not be able to do much in terms of your case towards him, but I can use my prestige in the professional community to keep you safe!" Seung Joon counters, hoping his reasoning would convince her.

"You don't love me Seung Joon-ssi. How can you propose marriage?" Seri argues, for marrying without love after bearing witness to the love and devotion Jeong Hyeok had wholeheartedly given her, did not make sense anymore. She had found her worth and her sense of self through him, learning to value herself as a person not merely defined by her place in society.

But Seung Joon has his answer planned. "We can grow to love each other, but what is more important to you, your safety or the frivolity of love?"

The words to her were unfathomable to her, the months of staying under Jeong Hyeok's warmth changing her perspective on love.