The Devil's Assistant

Pasta with a Side of Pain in the Ass

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C.H.A.P.T.E.R. 3

      I stand in front of the Devil's office, seething. Who does he think he is, trying to butt in on my life? And my love life at that! I walk briskly away from the door towards my room. My mood instantly brightens when I see Cerberus, the three-headed guard dog of Hell, sitting happily on my bed, waiting for me.

       "Cerbie!" I squeal, and crouch down as he runs towards me.

      Cerberus might look scary to other people, but to me he's just a big teddy bear. Sheldon doesn't bother much with him-- he only calls upon him to devour the truly awful souls. I admit, it's kind of disturbing to see the dog eating people's souls, but you get used to it.

      Cerberus licks my face with all three of his tongues and I laugh. He's more of my dog than Sheldon's. And he's definitely not Will's. I think the next time Will bothers me for something I'll send Cerberus to chomp on him.

      "Yes, that's perfect," I say to myself and Cerberus, pleased with my plan.

       "Talking to yourself again, Tiff?" Will leans in the doorway, his hands in his pockets.

       "Don't you have souls to damn?" I shoot him an annoyed look.

      He only laughs and runs his hand through his ruffled dark brown hair. "And don't you have dog poop to be shoveling? I believe it's your turn to walk Cerberus," he says and points at the dog.

      "Wow, you haven't even been here for two weeks and already you're starting to sound like Sheldon. Good job, Will," I say and roll my eyes, turning my attention back to the dog. When Will doesn't leave I turn to him, my eyes narrowed.

      "Get the hell out of my room."

       "Or what?" he asks, teasing me.

       "I'll send Cerberus on you."

       "Cerberus wouldn't hurt me. The guy loves me."

     I snort. "Please. He doesn't like assholes."

      "Then why is he all over you?"

       My mouth opens in shock. Did he just call me an asshole? Oh, it's on.

      "Cerberus, get him." I point towards Will. I smile as Cerberus bounds off of my lap and runs towards Will, teeth bared. Will only smiles. 

      I expected Cerberus to pounce on Will.

      Which he did.

      What I did not expect was for him to start licking him. My mouth parts again.

      "What'd I tell you?" Will laughs that infuriating yet incredibly sexy laugh of his and pushes Cerberus off of him, standing up.

       "I cannot believe you've corrupted my dog," I say, crossing my arms over my chest.

       "Your dog? I believe Cerberus belongs to the Devil." He smirks.

       "Yeah, well the Devil can't be bothered with minor things like puppy love." I laugh to myself as I flop down onto my bed. "Although he can certainly be bothered with human love," I grumble, more talking to myself than to Will.