𝓃𝒾𝓃𝑒

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"I had another dream" whispered Nerissa Alvaro, whilst her dear sister continued to caress her long chocolate hair.

"Another dream. He was in it."

"Anson?" Cordelia questioned, also in a hushed whisper, as if any louder sound would cause Rissa to break into hysterics. Recently, it had been becoming more, and more, frequent. Anson was gone... and the forced happiness that Nerissa had tried to facade, day after day, was becoming increasingly cumbersome. 

Currently at two in the morning, Finnick had decided to go for a walk, leaving Nerissa alone in the warm, now seemingly empty, bed. He was her antidote. The herbicide to the tangles that seemed to grow out of control when he was away. Naturally, the night terrors crawled out to her vulnerable state, yet again. 

The games had forced her to be independent- and now she can't bear to be alone. 

She awoke, beads of sweat dripping down her forehead. Suffocating in her thin night dress. 

Her mind oscillating until the hopes and wishes and desperation for silence is all that the mind succumbs to. With the heavy bearings of life and actuality, until her cumbersome beggings become finally satisfied. 

Her mindset and mentality silenced, as always. Silenced, but still so, so jarring to her frail mind. Raucous, insistent shrills that submerge the whole universe beneath a tunnel of echoes. The only sound and noise being the world of self-destructiveness residing deep, deep inside her soul. 

What's new? As always, it is just a repetitive cycle, her mind repeats to her. Birth, life, death. The life stage always prayed to be short. Full of sour tears and deficient of gayety and levity. Full of the threats of the dear Capitol. Full of the rainwater that Snow leaves behind.

She thought of her sister, the years of nurture and loving care given to an innocent who is already to be demolished by the weights of the world. Soon, her best friend, her soul, her laughter, her light, her joy and her tears, will be exposed to the countless of threats of the unpreventable weights of the universe. 

She thought of her brother. She thought of Anson. Again and again. Another dream, he was talking with her. Laughing with her- over some ridiculous joke that seemed to make no sense at all. It wasn't a dream. It was a nightmare.

Being forced to hear her brother's voice again, but the hopeless reality that it was fake. All fake. 

He would never come back. He would never tease her whenever she became flustered. He would never race her to the quarry. He would never bring back tuna from his routinely fishing, just because he knew that she despised it so much. And it was all her fault.

She felt numb. She had cried so much that she had no tears to shed. She felt nothing apart from the gentle strokes of Cordelia's clumsy fingers.

"I miss him too." She said to her. 

Nerissa pressed her fingernails into her palm. It hurt, but she deserved it. 

She pressed her nails into her skin until the stinging sensation became almost unbearable- and then, she didn't stop. 

Footsteps sounded on the stairs, and a boy with golden hair, now seemingly dark in the light of the late hour. Though, by now Rissa was softly snoring, comfortable in the embrace of her awake sister.

"Shit, I just needed some air." Finnick said- more to himself than to Cordelia, as he ran to the other side of the bed and took Nerissa's cheek in his palm.

"Another nightmare?"

Cordelia nodded, "It was about Anson, at least, that's what she said."

"You know, she can't be without you, Finnick. Not for a second."

"But, Nerissa, she's the strongest person I've ever known. She, she's always been dependent on no one but herself." Finnick replied, he didn't want Nerissa to depend on him. He wanted her to be the strong girl her fell in love with. Of course, he still loves her dearly... but the fact that the games had took such a toll on her caused so much anger to flare inside of him. Not at her. At the Capitol. At Snow who, with every power to stop her torture, caused it and let the world watch. The thought of Nerissa in pain tore his heart into paper shreds.

"She's broken Finnick. So broken now, you know what Anson and Nerissa were like. She thinks the death of our brother is her fault. She thinks he should have survived,"

"No, Cordelia. No it's not her fault. We'll just need to keep reminding her of that, until it defies her stubbornness."

"She's lucky to have a sister like you, you know." He smiled at Cordelia.

"No, shes lucky to have you. Someone who has been through the games, and also loves her more than anything else in the world. I see the way you look at her, as though you would rather die than lose her. Though, I see the way she looks at you, and I would say you're the luckier one." She retorted.

"I would say I'm the luckier one too, and Nerissa is the most precious person in the world to me, I couldn't bear a day without her."

Cordelia smiled, "You'll take care of her? I should probably go back to bed."

"You know I will." Replied Finnick, bidding her goodnight with a quick peck on her forehead. 

He was grateful for his close relationship with Cordelia, she was like a sister to him and he loved her like family. Crawling under the duvet, with care not to awake Nerissa, he wrapped an arm around her waist and placed a leg over hers, warmth radiating off her and filling him with a mellow content.

"So, you can't bear a day without me, can you?" 


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⏰ Last updated: May 23, 2021 ⏰

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