Reason for change in reviewer: Unicorn had to go on sudden hiatus due to a malfunction in her device used for contact.
Plot:
So till now Hrithik Roshan and Taylor Swift meet in Edinburgh and fall for each other. Taylor has amicably interacted with Hrithik's two sons, Hredhaan and Hrehaan and the same is the condition with the brothers. After spending some more days together Taylor and Hrithik have decided to continue this by a long - term private relationship as it would be dangerous to make it a public one, considering the case that both of them are well - known celebrities. Then both of them go back to their own natives and Hrithik has confessed to his parents everything about what happened in Edinburgh, and about Taylor.
Positive aspects:
One thing I love the most about the story is the relative proverbs in between, they are an absolute treat to the chapter to the chapters which makes it much more interesting. It holds our interest in the book, and the curiosity exists to keep on reading further.
The plot is also a thing to be appreciated for. It's a beautiful idea and a topic liked by various peeps. I liked the way you destined their first meet and then the further meets, though a little more explanation about them would be appreciated. The idea of them being together outside was also nice.
I liked the way you showcased Taylor's playing with Hrehaan and Hredhaan, and the love depicted by that. I would like you to continue on with that, side by side along with the bonding of Taylor and Hrithik.
The duration of the chapters is nice, it keeps our interest and doesn't showcase too many incidents as it would be tough to handle too many experiences in just one chapter but the pace is, according to me, is a little fast which I will elaborate further.
Negative aspects:
One of the forth most things I would like to point out is that there could be considerable improvement in the grammar and punctuation of the book. This happens in almost all the books, but if you concentrate on this it becomes more interesting to read then. In such cases you can sometimes have your own personal editor, it helps.
Another thing is that in the starting of the book the POV of both Hrithik and Taylor was described for the same one chapter so it was apparently the same chapter but written twice with different POVS which made it not so interesting but the problem resided in the further chapters. If you repeat some chapters again, they don't make it much interesting, the interest of reading them lessens. Thus in such cases it's better to stay with new chapters but with different POVs, if you want to depict both of their POVs.
Coming to the pace of story. According to me it's a bit too fast. Like about how they bonded, then just in a few days they started kissing and had unknown feelings for each other. Kissing was fine but sudden development of feeling is unexplained, at most it could be physical attraction based on the looks. Even identity revelation, according to me it should have happened later along with the bonding but it happened way too early which reduced an interesting element without exploiting it to full potential. So here the story started a bit too fast.
Moving to plot regarding Ayesha, it is given that Hrithik loves Ayesha a lot but there is no clear explanation about it. There could have been a chapter about Hrithik showing his grief for his lost wife. Instead of just stating the fact that he was in grief, it would have added an interesting backstory for Hrithik subsequently adding depth to his character. Some history in such cases are always beneficial and holds the interest of the reader.
The next point is common in almost all the books, plot holes. In various chapters there isn't a clear explanation of the incident like how they reached there, or how exactly each of them felt about each other. In most such cases there is confusion that is generated within the readers which has to be dealt with subtle indications for readers to look into. Clearing facts helps the reader to understand the plot better.
Another point that I noticed was almost all the scenes are in the house itself. What's exactly the use of showing that they both are on a relaxing vacation when you are not using resources of surrounding. It would have been better if some scenes were on the beach or the garden or any other spot outside their place.
It would also be nice if some chapters would even be in the POV of Hrehaan and Hreedhan as apparently Taylor and Hrithik are going to marry and the kids' opinion about Taylor has to be expressed, asked and carried on with.
Last I would like to point is in prologue the POV was written unknown, it would have been better if that point was used adequately but like pointed earlier author rushed with the points and revealed in the beginning itself regarding the identity of the person and the possible events of the story which dwindles down the enthusiasm.
Overall analysis:
Overall the book is nice, and the idea is really good. I would just recommend you to go on with the relative proverbs and to keep a check on the grammar. The pov of the brothers should also be added and plot holes to be looked after. I am sure that the book will become really interesting if the edits were looked after! I thoroughly enjoyed the book and would love to read an edited, better version of this. Wishing you best of luck for all your other works too!
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