torment in paradise

IV

the return to 'home' was anything but pleasant, leaving a house full of laughing and genuine love to their mundane white prison of loneliness. a car ride full of longing and a general sense of regret, at least for Tommy, Toby on the other hand was bouncing in his seat rambling on to Tommy about the things they'd get up to in a house that big. something about hide and seek without care workers telling them off and being able to eat food whenever they wanted. Tommy nodded along lovingly, in awe at the pure unfiltered excitement and not a seemingly negative thought in his friends head, staring out the window glittering his eyes along dewy leaves. he absentmindedly pulled out a fidget toy out of his bag and handed it to Toby who flapped it around happily while continuing his non-sensical tangent. half way through the hour or so long car ride Tommy had fallen asleep against the window and Toby was intently listening to his barely legible sleep talking and was answering dramaticlly to every string of words.
by the time they arrived home it was well past lights off so the boys were ushered straight off to bed and to reflect the day they had they both fell straight asleep in the clothes they wore the day prior. a gentle summer breeze shook the leaves of the trees once climbed by kids off all ages now sectioned off by rope and classed as a health hazard, Toby sat as he did each morning studying a family of birds as they followed their strict morning regime. they hopped along the branches one after another perhaps, Toby had gambled, checking the quality of the large plant, as soon as the early morning trickle of sunlight came in as if on protocol they began their morning song. on the first note Tobys mind was kicked into action mode and he got up to sing his own little morning tune, in the way of menial morning tasks completition.
Tommy sat in the corner of the dining hall accompanying the small spiders and dusty floors that the workers never bothered to clean, he carried his eyes along the faces of his peers yet never truly got the nerve to recognise. 4 long fold up tables like the ones you'd find at a barbacue littered with all types of different coloured and material chairs donated by offices and schools around the area. the space by his side was empty as it usually was and as the clock hit 8 Toby rolled I'm smooth as clockwork with a bowl of what looked like baby food but was actually some sort of off brand porridge, always the same brand, always made the same way, strict unchanging routine seemed to be the only thing they got right in this retched place and that was something all the kids here appreciated. through the constant war field of Foster care, court cases and custody battles the only thing these boys craved was order and due to their neurodivergencies they were granted it in a place set up especially for them, the centre had depleted in rankings over the years and was heavily understaffed/undertrained but at least they stayed to a schedule.
transfers of trivial facts and the usual influx of new bird facts Toby had learnt that week that Tommy reminded him gently that he had said this the day prior and the day before that. as soon as their insensical flow of conversation trickled to a hault and they had finished washing their bowls Tommy's social worker rushed up to them and hurried them away. the passage of information hadn't quite processed itself in Tommy's head so by the time he was dressed he had only just realised the tru depth of what was happening. he was getting the final interview, the beloved, the notorious final interview, he had had plenty final interviews in his time but this felt alot different. he wasn't sure this time as he usually was that he'd be returning shortly after, the prospect of that was almost... frightening to him now. he threw the though into a metaphorical fire and burnt it alongside every hope he had for a normal life. the boys were led on their formal atire to one of the bigger fancier meeting rooms they had available, an unfamiliar feeling of excitement riddled with a general sense of guilt wriggled its way past Tommy's long built up walls and as he sat in front of a team of Lawers, Phil, his and Tobys social worker and the main career of the home he felt moe fragile than he ever had. they talked over logistics, money, the kids mental and physical health. stupid stuff Tommy has learnt to drown out, none of the information ever reaches the adults anyway, they take him home and there are no accommodations in sight. Phil wasn't like the others though, he seemed to be intently listening, asking questions even and writing things down in a little book, surely it was act, surely it was all an act to just get the money that every foster parent leaches off kids for. Because of Tommy's general behaviour a contract was drawn up that both the kids had to sign, three strikes and Tommy can't be placed for three months and will have to go to therapy again and complete an mental health assessment before being placed again, this had never been implemented before but to the request of the Lawers extreme measures had to be taken. Tommy's behaviour as of recent had been getting better in his defence yet the last placement he was in he pushed a four year old down the stairs. Compared the behaviour he had 6 years prior when first getting put into foster care he was extremely tame which could arguably be Tobys influence mixed with the countless amount of empty therapy appointments and being moved to this centre.