Chapter 8

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A week after running away..

Izuku's POV.

As I was walking along the streets I began to think..

I don't even know what to do anymore. I'm so sick of everything. I don't wanna be homeless but I don't wanna go back to the orphanage. It's like I'm all alone in a world full of people. I just feel so lost and hopeless..

I don't wanna go on. I don't even know if I can go on. My body is so fragile and weak. I just feel hopeless.

I want to cut so badly, but they'd get infected since I can't care for them properly. Infections honestly suck and I'd rather not deal with that..

I crave the feeling of the blades on my skin. It's like I'm drowning without being underwater.

Why am I still trying? Should I just..

Give up?

Ok um I'll weigh out the pros and cons!

If I keep living I'll probably just die from malnutrition..

Con

But uh maybe things will get better? Oh who am I kidding that couldn't count as a pro.

If I go back to the orphanage maybe people will be sympathetic and stop abusing me! No that would never work out. I'd get locks installed on the bedroom doors and I'd have no freedom if I went back..

Con.. I guess.

But what if I see Mina again! No who would wanna see me? She already wasted her time and bandaids on me so she probably hates me by now.

So far that's all cons Izuku~ c'mon just do it! Nobody would care and you'd be making so many peoples lives easier!

What about my mom though!? What if I get to see her again?

Really? Please she left you all alone at that orphanage. 'For the best' yeah right. She was just waiting for a chance to get rid of your sorry ass.

Tears formed in my forest green eyes.

You're right..

Exactly! Nobody wants you here. Remember your dad? You ruined his and your moms life by just existing! You should just go-

Alright I get it! I'm a worthless waste of space and I should just kill myself! I get it stop! I can't take it anymore.

I yelled out in my head. My hands firmly gripped onto my hair as if that would make the voice go away.

Oh lookie there, a nice and high bridge~

My eyes look over to my right a bit and I see a bridge stretched across a cliff side. It was next to the ocean but there was a spot where if you fell you'd land onto the shore.

Go over there. Hurry. You don't wanna waste more oxygen and space in the world than you already have do you?

Alright fine.

My mind felt as though it was filled with fog as my feet carried me in the direction to where I'd meet my eternal sleep.

Sorry I failed you mom. I couldn't be strong like you expected of me. I ruined your life and wasted your time. Dammit..

Salty tears ran across my freckles. My mind was racing. I felt like shit but it was all gonna end soon. I'll feel free from this hell.

I arrived at the flat bridge and just stood for a moment, placing my hand onto the wire fence. I smiled. At least I'd die looking at a pretty sunset. The one thing that didn't seem so bad in this cruel world.

My eyes looked upon the scenery, the ocean glistening in the suns last rays that were going to disappear for nightfall shortly. The beautiful horizon colored with purple, red, yellow and pink.

It was absolutely gorgeous.

I snapped out of my thoughts and looked at the wire fence, noticing a short bit of the metal was coming undone at the bottom. Perfect.

I stepped over to the part of the fence and bent down to lift it up.

This is the only thing stopping me from falling off. I'm causing all this trouble by ruining this fence. If I just wasn't born then things would be so much better.

The chain came up and I pulled it enough for me to walk through. I was now on the ledge. Looking down at the shore that's.. I'm not even sure how far it is, I just know it's high enough to kill me.

More tears fell down but I didn't wipe them away. I was scared, yeah.. but I also felt relived.

It'll be like I was never here.. Kinda like I never existed. I just stood there and closed my eyes. Basking in the suns rays that would disappear for nighttime soon.

Kinda like how I would too.

As I stood I heard quick foot steps rushing along the sidewalk that I walked on a few minutes ago. I paid no attention to it. Probably someone going for a run.

The sounds of cars speedily driving by made me think..

I wonder if the people driving by are happy. What if they feel like me? I hope not, I'd never wish this upon anyone else but myself.

I heard the roar of a motorcycle engine go by and it made my ears ring, it hurt my eardrums.

I wonder if death is gonna hurt..

Well, I'm about to find out.

I stepped forwards a bit and began feeling myself fall, I expected to keep going down but I got yanked back upwards. My vision became cloudy and I heard someone yelling. I felt something firmly grasp my forearm. I tried to process what was going on, then everything went black.

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Hey! Sorry about the late chapter, I've been procrastinating all day but I knew I just had to do it or I'd forget lmao. Well anyway thanks for reading!

974 words ♡'・ᴗ・'♡

6/5/21

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