Dear Katie (BoyxBoy)

41

Dear Katie,

So I kissed Luca. I told you I was going to talk to him. I hated the way that he avoided me. I know what he feels, I know because I feel it too.

There is no way that he’s that oblivious about this.

Yesterday, I stomped all the way to where he was. Crouched down near a stream of water, we had taken a small break from walking and he grunted an incoherent jumbled words that I recognized as ‘I’m gonna go and get water.’  And after I took 3 slow breaths. In and out. Just like how mom used to tell us when we need to build up courage; “take 3 slow breaths and let it go”.

I gathered my thoughts and followed after him. He must’ve heard me because he instinctively grabbed his machete and turned around. He visibly relaxed when he saw that it was just me. I glared at him and he asked me what my problem was.

I wanted to say ‘YOU! You fucking asshole! You’re my problem!’ but I didn’t say that, instead I said ‘Why are you avoiding me?’ He snorted and went back to what he was doing.
Crouched down and not facing me.

I groaned in frustration and took a tentative step forward. I told him that he can’t avoid me forever and he didn’t respond as if to say; ‘watch me!’.

The next thing that I did was so damn childish. Everytime I thought about it I wanted to curl up into a ball and let the ground eat me alive, the shamelessness in my actions was so cringe-worthy.

I stomped all the way to the stream, like a child, might I add. Luca still didn’t pay me any mind and so I took a palmful of water and dunk it all in his head. There was a moment of silence that engulfed us once I did what I did. Shock was present in his face. I gave him a raised brow, challenging him.

Air was pushed out of me, everything was so fast, as cliche as it sounds. He surges his body into mine, and Katie I might actually be crazy, because instead of fearing for my life… my head was screaming ‘FINALLY!’

Finally he’s touching me again. Finally he’s looking at me again (even if he looks at me with frustration present in his green green eyes). I huffed out an air as my back hit the ground, his body pressed above me and my whole mind was going haywire. I never noticed how perfect his body was against mine. I never noticed how his eyes are not just green but there's also freckles of brown and blue.

His hands were steadily holding him up and I thought that if I moved his hands slightly he would lose his balance and fall right into me. His lips would fall into mine… the thought surrounds me, it flutters my stomach and the tingling sensation goes from my gut into every nerve in me.

And I couldn’t breathe… 

We looked at each other. His eyes went up to my eyes and down into my lips and I did the same.

1… 2… 3…

It’s like he also counted, also gathered his courage then his lips were on mine.

And I could breathe again.