Panacea [A Fruits Basket Fanfiction]

Chapter 7 - Desultory

Desultory/ˈdesəlˌtôrē/ - occurring without a plan or structured order

18 years ago...

"Kureno!" A young Mayumi called out to him with a bright smile on her face. "Kureno!"

He turned towards her with a smile of his own. "Mayumi!"

She grabbed his hand and quickly ran, dragging him along with her. "Hurry, before Shigure-nii catches us!"
"Mm!"

"Ah, there you guys are!" Shigure had seen them run off and follows after them.

Mayumi squeals before speeding up. "Hurry, Kureno!"

He lets out a few pants before running faster. Eventually, he overtakes Mayumi and begins dragging her behind him. Mayumi looks back and jumps a little when noticing how close Shigure actually was. His outstretched hand was getting closer and closer, but then he stumbled over a stray rock, which ultimately trips him. His body is falling and he closes his eyes, preparing to transform subconsciously because he knew he would end up hugging a female.

"Oof!"

"Ow!"

Mayumi twists back to look at Shigure. "Shigure-nii, next time, don't drag me down when you fall." But he didn't have the typical oops face. Instead, he was confused, the shock on his face was evident. A small frown forms on her face when she notices his abnormal behavior and she glances at Kureno, but even he has the same look mirrored on him. "What? Why do you two look like that?"

"Mayumin... I didn't transform," Shigure tells her slowly.

It takes a few seconds until the fact sinks in. Her confusion slowly morphs into a mix of happiness, fear, and wonder. It wipes off her face as they all stand up. "Shigure-nii, just to make sure, hug me again."

Her order makes him flinch a little because even if he said being a zodiac didn't really bother him, it was still a little disturbing after hearing these things for so long. He opens his arms shakily, slowly walking towards her and Mayumi meets him halfway, hugging him. They wait for a few seconds before pulling apart and looking at each other with furrowed brows.

"You didn't change."
"I didn't change."
Mayumi then turns to Kureno, who jumped a little. "Kureno, let me hug you." He shakes his head nervously, his face red as well. "Wh-What if I transform?"

Without warning and disregarding his fearful thought, Mayumi wraps her arms around Kureno's neck. He immediately stiffened up and closed his eyes, but like Shigure, he didn't transform either. She lets go after realizing this, and when she glanced around, the same dumbfounded look was reflected on all of their faces.

Her little hands start shaking and she brings them close, trying to stop the involuntary movement. "Wh-What should I do? Th-This has n-never happened b-before. A-And I'm not a zodiac either." Small beads of tears gather in the corner of her eyes as she starts panicking.

No longer anticipating the change, Kureno pulls her into his arms without any hesitation. He rests the side of his head against hers. "It's going to be okay, Mayumi. It's going to be okay," Kureno murmurs in her ears, and she gradually calms down. Shigure comes up behind her, patting her head and giving a reassuring smile as she looks up at him. "Don't worry, Mayumin. Worst case scenario is that you'll be made to forget about us."

"Eh?" The tears come back and her lips quiver at the thought of forgetting her precious friends. Because of this freak accident, would she lose these precious bonds?

"Shigure-niisan!" Kureno tugs her closer in his embrace.

"Ah, sorry, sorry!" Shigure waves his hands around, a sheepish expression appearing on his face. "Like I said, that would be the worst scenario, so it's probably not gonna happen!"

"Really?" She looked up with big doe eyes, the unshed tears glistening in them.

Both of them nod their head vigorously when attacked with the sight of Mayumi about to cry. "That means you're special, Mayumin. You're the first girl we can hug without worrying about our change. And maybe the only one that's not part of the zodiac," Shigure tells her, patting her head.

"But, why? Why me?" Mayumi asks in a small voice. Her hands clutch onto Kureno's shirt more tightly, her thoughts running in chaotic circles.

"That's something we can't answer." She sighs at Kureno's response, even if it was what she expected. "But Mayumi... you've been blessed with a gift." Her eyes widened at this. A gift? What could this gift do? Hugging the zodiac males would be something individual to her as an outsider and it was unique. But what help could she provide with that?

Little did she know then, but that gift, that ability, was what saved so many of those children in the zodiac. That warm embrace when it seems like everything was going wrong, when it felt like everyone in the world was against you, when you feel like all hope has been drained from your life. That warm embrace lets you know that there is someone by your side. That even if it feels painful and suffocating, someone will be there to comfort you and make you feel safe. When you feel like your existence has no meaning, that warm embrace proves that you do mean something. And even if it's just to one person, then that makes all the difference. To know your life has meaning, then that's enough to keep going, to keep trying, to keep living.