Avengers: With Ghost Rider, Deadpool, and Venom

Meeting Loki and butting heads with Iron Man

Johnny, Eddie, Wade, and Steve were preparing for the mission.

Steve: Wait, they tricked you into an experiment?

Wade: They told me they were going to cure my cancer and make me a superhero.

Steve: Now you spend your life killing people?

Wade: Hey, I'm always killing people. I'm an assassin.

Eddie: Something we have in common. What next, you live in a shabby apartment?

Wade: How did you know? Except I lived with an old blind lady as my roommate.

Natasha: Getting acquainted?

Johnny: Yeah. What a going on?

Natasha: We found Loki's location. In Germany.

Wade: Great! We'll pick up a big pretzel along the way.

They all looked at him like "what?"

Wade: No? Schnitzel? Bratwurst and Sauerkraut?

Steve: Shut up and suit up.

Wade: Ok, fine. Afterwards. I get it. Someone's out of shape from those 70 years they've been asleep from.

Time skip

Wade and Steve were nearby when Loki caused a big panic in the street.

Wade: Why aren't we attacking?

Steve: The exact same reason that you should keep your mouth shut.

Loki trapped them, made them kneel and had a big speech.

Wade: See, Steve? He's a villain and he's not being discreet.

Steve: Just wait for my signal.

An old man stood up and spoke against Loki.

Wade: Wow. He's got guts.

Loki was about to blast.

Wade: Oh man. Steve, if we don't get out there, that old man's gonna end up in the hospital, and I'm afraid he's not gonna live. And I'm afraid that I won't be able to write something nice on his tombstone.

Steve: Now.

They jumped out. Steve blocked the blast.

Steve: The last time I was in Germany, there was a man standing above everyone else. We ended up disagreeing.

Loki: The soldier. And who are you?

Wade: Oh, I'm Santa Claus. And I'm after the reindeer that ran over Grandma.

They both looked at him.

Wade: Get it? Cause of the reindeer horns on his gold helmet.

Loki: You're both out of time.

Steve: We're not the ones out of time.

Natasha appeared in the Quintet above and spoke.

"Loki! Drop the weapon and stand down!"

Loki blasted at her instead.

Wade: Looks like he doesn't respect the authorities.

They both fought Loki, until he had them pinned down.

Loki: Kneel.

Steve: Not today.

He kicked him off.

Wade: Yeah. The only way I'm gonna kneel to an offence to Vikings everywhere, is when I'm dead.

They locked weapons.

Wade: And I never die.

Loud heavy metal rock played and Iron Man flew in and shot down Loki. Wade was impressed.

Wade: Woah. Hardcore entrance.

Tony: Make a move, reindeer games.

Wade: I already made that joke.

Loki surrendered.

Tony: Good move.

Steve: Mr. Stark.

Tony: Captain. Wade.