Sebaciel One shots

Why not me?

Ciel's P.O.V
The thought of losing you...I can't even...The pain is just too unbearable.
I love you,and I forgave you for your every mistake and you know why?
Because I love you and what a mistake that was of mine.You know all you did was cause me pain and tell me something did you enjoy it?Making me cry myself at night as I think about you.Having to beg for you to come back.
This pain is just too much for me.You say you're sorry but are you really?Do you think of me as an idiot?A fool?Why must you play with me?Just end this already because I can't.I always believe that you'll change so that's why I forgive you, but every time I do you do the same thing again.Its like a process that happens over and over again.You leave me and go to her arms instead.Let me ask you one thing,Did you ever really love me?Or was it a lie?Did you use me?
When you proposed to me you told me me you'll make me the most happiest alive and forever be by my side,to never leave or lie to me,to cherish me,make me your first priority, your everything.Was that to a lie?
I accepted.
I believed you.
I gave you all my trust.
You cheated on me.
Lied and deceived me.
Hurt me in the most wretched way.
But why?
I know now that our love won't ever be the same.You've forgotten me and went to give off your love to another.But please at least help me realize this isn't love but a sick game of yours because I can't.I still think there's a chance were you'll come back and forget her and come back to me to love me again.Its impossible,I know.You just love her too much.I'd do the same but you can't just do that to two people you know that I know that I've seen you two together.Hands intertwined,smiling,sharing laughs,and the worst part...showing affection towards her in public when clearly you know were still together.If you love her that badly why are you still here?What hurts is why can't I forget you after all you've done to me...I ask myself this:Why can't I forget about you?

I gulp the last drop of liquor throwing it to the wall.
I cursed as shards of glass flew everywhere.i close my eyes and curl up in the floor crying letting the shards into my skin cutting it,letting red liquid pour across the floor.I smile and just lay there.I laugh remembering all those time we've spent together.No.Just forget him he's not worth it anymore