𝐇𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐦𝐞, 𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐦𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐭..

Chapter 12

"Sykkuno?" Bret whisper-yelled at Sykkuno who laid next to him. "Earth to Sy?"

Sykkuno ignored him as he continued to scroll through his phone in an attempt to find more information on the disease.

"Sykkuno??" Bret yelled, pushing him off the bed.
"Ow," Sykkuno groaned at the impact of his body hitting the hardwood floor. He tried to catch his breath quickly before looking up to Bret. "Why?!".
"I was being ignored!"
"Sorry" Sykkuno apologized before getting up and throwing himself back on Bret's bed.
"Are you okay?" Bret asked, "you're all weird, you have been since lunch"
"Yeah.. I'm just-" Sykkuno looked up, finally meeing Bret's eyes which were shining with worry.
"Is it that btch? Lucas? Did he bother you?"
"No-no, it's not him.. not really, at least."

"It's him and Corpse.." Bret filled in.

Sykkuno felt tears well up in his eyes just at the thought of them being together. He could feel his chest start to burn more intenselynand the water was beginning to fill up his throat once more.

"Sy.."

Sykkuno closed his eyes as he tried to calm down the pain that grew inside him. He squeezed his hands into fists as he breathed in and out but he could barely keep it in. This was not like before. The last two symptoms bothered him to no end and it hurt, but he couldn't hide those symptoms well. He could handle the pain.

"Are they together right now?" He wheezed.

"I think so.. Are you okay?" You sound like you have trouble breathing.."
Sykkuno breathed in again and winced at the pain before letting out a weak "I'm fine."

"No. No, you aren't.." Bret frowned before leaning in to hug him, "I know it doesn't fix anything but I'm here."

Sykkuno let Bretman hug him, he cried as he felt the pain become sharper and stronger until it was nearly blinding. He couldn't help the frustration that consumed him as he pulled himself off the bed, pulled away from Bret and started pacing the room.

"I hate this!" He screamed. "I hate this! I don't want this, I don't want to love him like this!"

"I know that you love Corpse, but listen to me Sy, as much as we both hate it.. he's with Lucas, and there's nothing that can be done..
Why don't we set you up with someone new? help you move on?"

"I don't know Bret." Sykkuno whispered, "I love him so much. I can't even begin to explain it.."

Bret frowned as he watched his best friend, he grabbed his hand and pulled him close once more, "Corpse doesn't deserve your love."

"..even if that were true, which is not.. he has it.. I don't know how or why it has to be him, but it is and there's no one who could replace him. I don't know why out of everyone it had to be him, someone who doesn't even love me back."

"He does love you back, he ju-"

"Obviously not enough..." Sykkuno choked out.

"Sykkuno.."
"Don't worry about me.. I'm okay, seriously I'm alright.. I swear."

Bret gave him an unconvinced look. "Want me to go get some cookie dough ice cream from the fridge?" Bret offered.
"Yes please.." Sykkuno said. He wondered if he actually wanted the ice cream or if he really just needed a few minutes to himself.

"Be right back!" Bret smiled, hugging Sykkuno quickly and then ran out of the room.

Sy looked down, towards the screen of his phone with teary eyes as he reread everything the article said. He felt his palms get sweaty and his hands start to shake as he came to the realization that he did have this disease. Sykkuno, age 17 [? not sure what age to put], admittedly lived a lot more life than the average 17-year-old dying of a disease that he'd just recently found out it existed. His death summed up in so few words, the story that will be told about him after he's gone.

No one in a few years will even know why he had the disease. Why he didn't do anything about it. They won't understand..
They're not going to know about Corpse, his best friend, the boy who like to skateboard and make music. The boy who called his friends "babe" and checked up on them every day because he just cared too much. Because he was that good of a person. Corpse who loved with his entire being,
and Corpse, the boy who he would always love but never love Sy they way he needed him to. "only comes when someone who is unconditionally in love with someone, and the person they love either doesn't love them, is confused, or loves someone else."
Lucas's words echoed in Sykkuno's head as he tried to keep the water down.

He wasn't ready to die and he didn't want to die because someone didn't love him enough..

Lucas-Sykkuno DMs:
S- hi
L- hey??
L- Sykkuno, I didn't expect for you to text me.
S- yeah I didn't either..
S- but I searched up what you were talking about, earlier today
S- the Hanahaki Disease thingy
S- and I wanted to ask how you knew about it?
L- it's fine
L- my dad almost died because of the disease, when my mom had an affair.
S- oh sht, I'm sorry
L- yeah but luckily he survived
L- he moved on from my mom just in time
S- how? Google said the only way to survive is painful surgery and the person you love loving you back/ not being confused with their feelings.
L- Google doesn't have all the answers
S- oh, okay.
S- what did you mean by 'on time'?
L- at stage 2, my dad was bad but he wasn't bad enough.
L- even at stage 3, as long as you do either the surgery or move on, you can survive.. Also the speed of the disease and how many stages someone goes through depends on the person. Luckily, my dad had enough time.
L- but umm, why are you so curious??
S- creative writing project.. wanted to make it a tragic romance.
L- oh that's cool
L- well good luck..
S- thank you

Sykkuno's journal:
CrEatIVe wRitInG PrOjeCt -_-
I DON'T EVEN TAKE CREATING WRITING
he was being kind of sus but whatever.. at least now I know what's wrong with me.

so basically my options are, a painful surgery that costs thousands of dollars, him loving me back (which at this point isn't happening) OR moving on and falling for someone else :))) easy..

who would I even move on to?..

I'm just going to sleep and hope for some miracle to happen and give me the answers i need.

Sykkuno's phone:
Message from Mark: Sykkuno.. I'm sorry again.. please find a way to fo.. [full msg is not shown on notif]
Message from Mark: I know I've been a dck. I know I'm not the best..
Message from Mark: he doesn't love you but I do.

Sykkuno-Mark DMs:
M- you know blocking won't help
M- please, I'm trying here
M- I saw what happened today in the cafeteria, are you okay?
M- Sykkuno.. I'm sorry again.. please find a way to forgive me
M- I know I've been a dck, I know I'm not the best.. And I've made mistakes, but I love you Sykkuno.
Please, i DO love you.
M- he doesn't love you but I do
M- can we please talk? talk about this

Continuation of Sykkuno's journal:
..that's not a miracle.

I'm going to regret this.

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Oh no, what's Sykkuno thinking? Things are getting intense for Sy!! Thank you for reading my stories and voting, it means a lot <3.