K. by Cigarettes After Sex (DNF)

selfish - 3

Dream POV:

I couldn't do that to George.

I don't care how good he looked. He looked absolutely gorgeous, dressed in black head to toe really compliments his pale skin and matches well with his dark hair and deep eyes.

I fell for him a while ago, but now I've really fallen.

I couldn't kiss him.

I don't deserve him, I know that he came out as gay not too long ago to Sapnap and I, and he knows I'm bisexual, but that still doesn't make it right.

I can't take advantage of my best friend when I'm full of want right now.

Kissing him would screw everything up.

Especially if he doesn't like me back, then I'm just selfish for getting what only I want.

It's been a few hours since George arrived, he's currently taking a nap in his new, hopefully his new, room. 

Currently 11 AM, we all skipped breakfast, too busy talking and catching up in the 5 hours we couldn't.

We talked about how life will be like when George moves here, it's almost 100% guaranteed that he's moving here. George seems most excited out of the three of us which makes it better, but he still speaks as if moving here is an "if" not "when" which slightly upsets me.

If George moves here, then we can spend more time together.

Much more time together.

I can finally see him face to face, well, I guess he's the one seeing me face to face but to be fair I still only see him through pixels.

And he is much prettier in person.

Before he took his nap, I guided him upstairs, passing Sapnap along in the hallway. I opened the door for George and told him how his pretty privilege really amplified in person.

I only got a door in my face, but his smile was definitely there and so was his flushed face.

-

I kept thinking about how close we were that morning.

George was inches away from my lips.

He seemed to have moved forward but I might've been imagining that part, otherwise I know how close I made myself get. It wasn't very close.

I wasn't expecting to get very intimate with the boy I have a crush on, especially this early.

Obviously, I make flirty "jokes" to see George get flustered and embarrassed, but that's why I make them. To see him struggle with simple compliments is so entertaining, even though he thinks I'm joking it's still fun. I mean, he's never told me to stop making them, so part of it makes me believe he likes the flirting. 

I hope to believe he likes the flirting.

Sapnap knows.

He's known for months now, almost a year actually, about my feelings with George. In all honesty, I don't think Sapnap would've been as convincing to George to move here if he didn't know about my feelings, so I'm glad I told him.

I just know that once George really moves in, then Sapnap's gonna be making more jokes than me, but he hasn't started them just yet. He wants George to actually want to live here, instead of scaring him away while he still has the decision of moving or not.

To be fair, this house is really nice. I told everyone, including friends and fans, that Sapnap and I just got a small rental because we didn't need the extra space, but that's pretty much the opposite.